Stay Alive
by CommanderCRaZyEffect
Summary: It's funny how you go from being a tribute one minute, to a helpless captive, to a rebel with a goal all in the space of four years. I don't know how, but I did it and I'm still alive to tell the tale. How exactly I managed to get to this point? Well even I can't explain that one. SEQUEL TO; THE BEGINNING IS NOT THE END.
1. Chapter 1

Things are dark as i awake. The thick curtains of the room are preventing the warm sunlight from seeping through the windows. Though this darkness i find myself in, it represents what i currently feel everyday all day. It's been like that for months.

I lay there on the bed, staring up at the shadowed Capitol seal on the red canopy hanging over me. As I look at it and think on what it symbolises, the more I wish I was dead. I don't want to be here. In the Capitol, living in this mansion, being the grandson of a man i despise. I want to be at home, my real home, in District Seven. I want to see my mom, my brothers. I can't say dad, because if what Snow tells me is true, then the man I grew up calling dad is anything but that. In fact my real dad is dead. Killed by Snow after he discovered what was happening between him and my mother. Believe it or not he was a Victor from District Eight, won his games sometime after Haymitch Abernathy.

What I do know is that Snow forced this man into prostitution, just as he has with current victors Finnick Odair and Cashmere. My mother was his secret lover, meeting with him under different guises to hide from Snow that she had fallen for somebody from the districts. Now that's not entirely outlawed as far as i'm aware, but my mom is Snow's daughter, it wasn't acceptable to love a Capitol puppet.

Regardless of how much I wish it were otherwise, I get the feeling I'm going to be stuck here for a while. I'm not even permitted to leave the grounds of the mansion, yet alone travel to District Seven. Thanks to Snow, or should i call him grandfather, i'm officially under house arrest. It's that thought that makes me all the more determined to not get up at all today, but i know if i'm not up in ten minuets somebody will be in here getting me up.

Just as suspected after ten minuets pass and i'm not up, Adriana, my personally assigned Avox, runs into my room and starts pulling me out of the bed. I wave her off and she scampers over to open the curtains. The light almost blinds me as it weaves through the windows and into the room, the window revealing a breathtaking view of the Capitol outside. Considering I hate it here, even i'll admit it's something to see.

After she neatens the curtains, Adriana pulls out a suit from the drawers and goes to dress me in it.

"I'll get ready myself, it's fine." I take the clothes from her and smile.

Being unable to say anything to me, what with having her tongue cut out, she simply bows her head to me before taking her leave.

That's another thing I hate here, everything i'm told to wear, it's all suits. Stupid ones that Snow recommends. What i'd give to wear my dirty work overalls from Seven. I put on said suit without much of a complaint out loud, it isn't like i have anything else to wear. The jackets a greyish colour, the pants are white and the shirt is a lime green. It's meant for men of the Capitol, the ones who like to compete with the women with all their fancy colours and make up. I just look plain ridiculous wearing it.

As always, I leave my room where Adriana is tidying up for me and head to the rose gardens. Or better yet, i'm escorted to the rose gardens by Sullen and Fitch, Snow's personal lackeys. They look like idiots too, rocking the badass black jackets and and leather gloves.

In the gardens Snow is stood by the rose bushes, pliers in hand and cutting the flowers away from the stalks.

"Ah, you're up." Snow says as i stop behind him. "Finally."

"Sorry to keep you waiting." I roll my eyes whilst he is not looking.

"It's no trouble." He drops the roses he held into a basket and turns around to face me. "With current events, i'd imagine you have trouble sleeping at night."

"Events?" I ask.

"The Victory Tour."

Oh. THAT event. Of course he meant that. He hasn't let me forget that it's happening for the past twelve days since the tour itself started.

"I'm sure you're aware they'll be here this evening." Snow starts wiping his fingers on a rag he pulled out of his pocket.

"I'm aware." I nod.

How could I not be? Like I said, he's been mentioning it for days now. Using it to torment me, because there is no way i'm getting to see any of them and he'll make damn sure of that. Blight ... Johanna ... They aren't allowed to know i'm alive.

"Good." He smiles. "Then you know I must confine you to your room for the evening."

I slowly nod.

"It's for your own good." He started walking and I follow him. "If anybody were to discover you still live, imagine the consequences we'd face."

That sounds like more his problem than mine, to be honest. But Snow was obviously doing this for his own good, not mine. If he had any interest in my well being he'd spare me this bullshit and end it all.

"I understand." I lie.

"Good." He grins at me. "You have until six to do as you please, then I expect you to check in with Commander Wilks, he will see you to your room."

"Of course." I mumble.

Secretly i'm rather happy it's Wilks who's guarding me again, he's the only Peacekeeper in the entire Capitol who doesn't live and breath off of Snow's word. Unlike Commander Thread, that guy is the meanest most Capitol devoted man i've ever met. Plus, i'd actually consider Wilks a friend. He's been helping me out since he was assigned as my guard and Snow has no idea. At least i don't think he does. I hope he doesn't.

Regardless, with Wilks being the one to watch me this evening i know i'll be able to get away with a couple of minuets outside my room. It'll give me enough time find my only contact with the world beyond this damn mansion. I just hope he has something to tell me this time. When I last saw him the only information he gave me was about my own funeral in District Seven. I don't know how he got it, but he told me that the body the Capitol used to pass off as me was actually an Avox, one that resembled me only slightly. When the funeral took place everybody was forbidden from removing the lid of the wooden box, somebody having told my family that my body had decomposed quickly and wasn't pretty. I was also told that my family were there - obviously. My dad ... no, Eamon, wasn't too happy that they wouldn't let them say goodbye properly. Blight turned up and he read out a speech for me. Other than that there was just a few of the men and women I used to work with.

Apparently Johanna wasn't there, or if she was nobody saw her. Honestly I didn't expect any different. I've watched the interviews after she won, how she'd react when Caesar so much as went to say my name. I also saw the end of the games, how frustrated she grew when they were air lifting me out. She didn't cry or say something out loud, but I knew she blamed herself. If I could see her, i'd tell her to stop thinking like that and realise I was dead whether she helped me or not, I was right from the start of that countdown in the arena. Thinking that is all well and good though, i'll never actually get the chance to say it to her.

Anyway, I follow Snow around the garden for a little bit longer as he again explains to me why i can't be seen this evening. When thats over with I go to the library, as I would every other day, and sit in there with a book detailing the dark days and how the Capitol defeated the Districts and destroyed District 13. Turns out Snow is quite proud of all of this, the amount of damn books he has on it. I stay there for as long as i'm entertained, which isn't long, before I move on and start walking around with my head facing the floor. This has pretty much been my everyday routine since waking up from that induced coma almost a year ago now. I'm living my life exactly the same each day. The only difference is what I have for dinner each night.

Speaking of the coma, I had wondered myself how I ended up in it and how I was even alive to start with. The last thing I actually remember was bleeding out on the ground, with something crawling on my hand. That little thing, is the reason i'm here.

It was a venomous spider of a sort, genetically engineered by the Capitol. It's venom is mild, though in large numbers is supposed to course its way through the victims blood and thicken it, eventually cutting off the supply of blood to the heart. Meaning a slow, painful death for whoever encountered lots of these things. Since only one bit me, it's venom merely slowed down my heart rate, stopping me from pumping blood around my body as quickly and therefore preventing me loosing mass amounts of blood and thus only making me appear dead. Thanks to that tiny spider and it's venom, the Capitol had enough time to pull me out of the arena and prevent my death. I didn't ask them too and I honestly wish they hadn't sometimes.

Would've spared me the boredom of having to wonder these stupid halls everyday, thinking about what i'm going to do differently tomorrow. Should i shower with apple shampoo or pine? The only thing to debate with myself.

After i've walked through the offices on the left side of the main hall, entrance, whatever it is, I go to head up the stairs and go to the study when a deep, menacing voice shouts up to me.

"Hey!"

I turn around because that voice is all too familiar. Commander Thread, the big, ugly mean bastard that will do the dirtiest and nastiest of deeds in the honour of the Capitol and Snow's name. You can see by all the scars on his face he has been through some tough fights, and since he is still here the outcome of them all is pretty damn obvious.

"Commander." I say still looking at the ground.

"I hope you aren't planning any funny business this evening." He smirks wickedly. "I do have permission to beat your ass a little if you try anything."

A little beating from this guy would be all it took to kill me. Still, i'm willing to risk a painful death anyway.

"You won't have any problems from me Commander." I lie. "I'm going to stay in my room like a good boy and mope about all evening, like always."

He picked up on my sarcasm and stepped forward. "Watch yourself boy. Or I might just find a reason to put you in the ground."

"My apologies." I grin a little, feeling a bout of confidence stir in me.

Thread steps forward again until he's at the foot of the stairs glaring up at me. "Get moving." He growls.

I do as he says and slowly turn my back on him to walk up the stairs. I can hear him walking off laughing to himself when i get to the top. He's probably in charge of the guards at the party tonight, so he'll be off to meet with Snow. Two people i hate together, if only somebody will drop a bomb on their heads.

I decide to catch up with all the news and gossip in the Capitol by watching the TV, where of course re-runs of interveiws, promotions for the 72nd games and the Victory Tour constantly looped over all day. I end up watching the Flickerman show just as they revist yesterdays stop in District One. Nancy and Jackson were from one, if i remember correctly. I still have nightmares about the way I smashed his head off a rock until his brains were covering the ground. Or when I killed Nancy by sticking that knife in her head.

As i watch, I can see on the faces of the people in the crowd that they aren't interested in anything Johanna has to say. On the other side of the coin, Johanna doesn't look as though she gives a shit about anything she is saying either. She certainly doesn't mean it. On top of that is the families of Nancy and Jackson, in which Johanna's words are ringing really, really hollow. They'll have seen what she said to me after I killed Jackson and she was far from kind or sympathetic. I think it has to be awkward for her in District One, but then I remember, none of them have them have been quite like in District Two. Johanna clearly didn't want to be there, and those in the District didn't want her there. None of them had forgiven her for how she killed Marric apparently. Even though he will have shamed them by not winning, they still held a grudge for how ruthless and cold Johanna was as she killed him.

I've seen the footage of his death, how she eventually managed to get the upper hand after a long struggle and then slit his throat, watching him bleed to death, choking on his own blood. I even saw that same wild glint in her eyes that Amanda from Two had so often as she watched. She enjoyed it, seeing him go that way. I could say that I disapprove completely, but I remember what I said to her before she ran off. I told her to hurt him and she said she'll do more. Well she certainly did do more, way more.

The footage of the speeches end and on the screen a still happy as ever Caesar Flickerman walks onto a stage surrounded by an ocean of people and laughs in that annoying way that only he can.

"Heart wrenching stuff in District One there." He says putting his hands together. "We will catch up with Ms Mason and the rest of the District Seven team, when they round off their all important victory tour this evening in the very heart of the Capitol. The Presidential Palace."

Speaking of them rounding off the victory tour here, it's almost six in the evening and i'm supposed to see Wilks in the main courtyard which he patrols during the day.

I turn off the screen and leave everything how it was when I entered before starting out in a slow jog down the stairs and into the courtyard.

Outside, there is technicians everywhere, preparing the screens, lights and fireworks for this evening. Funny how they're only finishing them today, despite having been working on it since Johanna won. Over by the fountain in the centre is Commander Wilks, by the look of things he is overseeing that the food is all out and prepared for the party. It's a waste really, he's a good Commander, though because he is known to be softer than most of the others he's downgraded to babysitting duties.

"Ethan, there you are." He says as I walk over. "Thread's been hounding me all day to make sure you are here on time." He runs his hand through his greying hair and sighs.

"Well i'm here, though i'm not sure why I need escorting." I say.

"It's so Snow knows you aren't wondering around." Wilks starts walking and tells me to follow him. "It's just a precautionary."

I only nod. Even though Snow is right to take precautions, I still think it's ridiculous that i'm being babied.

We go back into the mansion, up the flight of stairs and then to my room. Once we are there, Wilks stops in the doorway and puts the key to the door - hidden inside a small pouch - down on a table on the inside of the room, making sure he hides it behind the plant that is also there.

"Twenty minuets is all you'll have, so make it quick and make it count." He pulls another key for the door out of a pouch on his belt. "Powell will be waiting on the lower balcony on the left side of the mansion at ten sharp. Don't miss him, like I said twenty minuets, he can't disappear too long."

Did I mention my contact is Powell? I don't think I did, but yeah. Of all things, he's Wilks' younger brother and the only person outside the mansion who know's i'm alive.

"I'll be there and back in twenty." I nod.

"Good." Wilks starts closing the door. "Make sure you are." With that he closes the door and locks it on the outside.

The plan is pretty simple really. During Snow's speech literally everybody, including most of the guards, will be gathered in the main courtyard to listen. Aside from the occasional patrol inside the mansion, it's pretty safe to meet. Powell will tell me how things are outside and that'll be that.

Four hours might seem like forever right now. But it'll be worth it in the end.


	2. Chapter 2

The party below is raging as the night air fills the courtyard. The Capitolians are having a ball of a time dancing, conversing, singing and stuffing their faces until they can barely move only to drink pink liquid that makes them vomit so they can keep eating. It's disgusting how they waste food like that. District Seven, home, is one of the wealthier districts in Panem, so not many of our people are starving. But out in the likes of Twelve, Eleven and Ten, people are dying of starvation every minuet of every day. The food they waste here in the Capitol in just one night, could keep a family of five well fed for months out in those districts.

Another thing with these people here in the Capitol, the vast majority of them are sideshow freaks. Some of them i've seen below in the courtyard have had their cheekbones completely reshaped to point out, others have had colourful spikes impaled under the skin to act as eyebrows. The scariest part is, they think they are beautiful, the literal height of fashion. What they don't realise is that to the rest of Panem they're laughing stocks, aliens who we mock because it makes us laugh.

This is one thing I aim to never become. Like one of them. I won't wear their stupid make up, or have my skin incrusted with diamonds. I won't talk with a stupid accent or walk on my damn toes. And I will not - not ever - truly consider myself to be a relative of Snow. I don't care about the truth. I might have to put him with him day in and day out, but the tide will change eventually. I will get out of here, I will get back to District Seven even if it kills me. I'm hoping Powell has something that can help me with that. Even if it's just some form of motivation to get out of here, more motivation then I already have. Anything is good enough for me.

I can't stay here. The more i'm stood here looking out of this window down at the party, watching as Blight tries to get Johanna to mingle with the people, the more i'm certain of the fact. I stay here and I never see those I care about ever again. Not my family not any of them, and it's made worse by the fact that they all think i'm dead.

By the time it's almost ten in the evening, i'm growing impatient. After waiting for four hours, doing nothing but watching the prats below dilly dally and laugh falsely, I think i'm starting to go crazy. I'm grateful to be out of the room when I eventually decide it's time to move. Before I leave to meet Powell, I make sure I lock the door behind me. That way, the only other person with a key is Wilks, therefore only he can get in. Unless the door is kicked in, which is always possible depending on who it is.

I avoid the main hall and staircase all together, the patrols are out in full down there, making sure nobody comes into this part of the mansion. Instead I take a faster route, and use the windows on the left side of the mansion to get to the meeting point faster, using the trees and bushes growing along the walls to get down safely. At exactly nine fifty five, Snow begins his speech to congratulate Johanna on winning the Hunger Games. Though I can't hear exactly what it is he is saying, i'm betting it's some corny crap that Egeria - the minister of affairs - has wrote for him as always.

Right on time Powell arrives, somehow his all black clothing proving useful by concealing him in the night and making him hard to spot. The first thing he does when he reaches me is pull me into a hug. I pretty much just stand there with my arms in the air until he takes his arms from around me and steps back.

"You are looking dashing." He comments. "Those suits look lovely on you."

I can't believe I miss this guy and his terrible compliments. "Thanks Powell, but..."

"But compliments aren't your thing and they're not why you are here." He must have read my mind.

"Exactly." I nod.

"Well, what do you want first, the good news or the bad news?" He asks leaning against the support beam for the patch of roof above.

"The good." I say without thinking.

"Right." He smiles a little. "Well good news is the little missy kept that necklace you gave her."

I only sigh. "I already know that."

I saw her wearing it in every district throughout the victory tour and yes it makes me feel happy, in fact better than that, to know that she decided to keep hold of it. I wanted her to have it after all. But the point of this was so I could find out information that I otherwise can't obtain by just watching TV.

"Well, I asked Blight how your family are and he told me that from what he knew they were doing fine, if still mourning you." That's a little bit better.

"Anything else that's ... Good?" I ask.

"Johanna has been insulting Cam these last two weeks. Giving her classy nicknames - the burning bush - and making a nuisence of herself at every opportunity." He chuckles. "I thought that would amuse you."

It does, but this is hardly the kind of news I wanted to hear. I'm starting to think that the bad news will be a story on how Camomile broke a damn nail and then wailed about it for hours.

"What's the bad news?" I rub my eyes.

When Powell sighs and a look of distress flashes across his face, my previous thoughts on how the bad news would be silly soon disappear. With a lengthy sigh, he reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out a crumpled sheet of paper that had been stuck back together messily.

"This isn't all of it, but it is the most important part I think. It's all I could recover from the trash without looking oddly suspicious." He explains.

I straighten out the paper and begin to read. I won't highlight the details of the letter, but within it's contents are Snow asking - no forcing - Johanna into prostitution. Just as he has with Finnick and Cashmere, and how he had with my real dad.

Crumpling the paper into a ball in my fist I say. " ... " Nothing. I don't know what words to use to describe what i'm feeling. Anger is too light a word.

"I did manage to talk with her the other night, by the sounds of it she has every intention on saying no. Not as politely as that from what I heard her screaming at Blight." Powell says quietly.

She can't do that, Snow would ... I don't know what he'd do but he'd make sure it hit her close to home. Right now i'm not sure which is worse.

"She can't refuse him, right? He'll kill her?" Powell asks.

"I don't know." I run my hand over my face.

"What exactly do you plan on doing?"

"I don't know, Powell." I say it angrily but quietly. I calm myself down before saying. "I'm sorry it's just ..." The fireworks begin firing into the air, meaning Snow's speech is over. "You should go. But thank you Powell."

He goes to argue the point, but in the end sighs and lets his head drop to the floor. "You watch yourself now. It's a dangerous game you are playing."

I nod.

"Until next time." Powell bows and begins walking off back to the party.

I break out into a jog as I get back into the mansion via the side doors. I know i'm supposed to get back to my room, but i can't force myself to go there, not when i know of Snows plans or how he will enact them this evening. Though what exactly can I do to stop him? Short of punching him and giving him something else to think about for awhile, i've got nothing. Even then it wouldn't do anything much but get me killed.

So what should I do? The question that revolves in my head as I round each corner and avoid the patrolling peacekeepers. Maybe if I can find Snow I can convince him too ... Who am I kidding? There's no way that he would listen to me. He doesn't like me, which is strange considering he keeps me around. I've never quite gotten around to finding out why he does and I doubt I ever will. The only other thing I can think to do is head to Snow's main office, he'll still be upstairs now, or at least he should be. I don't know what i'll do once i'm there, but I have to try something, anything. It's better than doing nothing at all. Maybe I can engrave a note for Johanna into his desk.

There isn't any problems as I sneak past the patrols in the main hall, they all seemed too enthralled by the fireworks outside to look behind them. It's when I reach Snow's office that I encounter the problem. Locked. Of course it was locked, why didn't I think of this? The only people who have keys are Snow himself and Egeria and i'm not getting it off either of them.

Damn it! There is no other way in that i know of.

Short of kicking it in i've got nothing, and it'll be pretty stupid of me to do that.

My next daring plan - and likely suicidal - is to go outside, into the party and find Johanna. If she doesn't kill me out of shock then i'm sure Snow and Thread will do it for bad behaviour. If they don't kill us both. No I can't do that, it's too risky for our lives and possibly everybody either of us knows.

Sighing I turn my back on the door, intent on going back to my room, only when I turn a solid fist connects to my jaw and knocks me onto the ground.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Commander Thread stands over me, an angry growl in his as points at me and then kicks me. "Get up!"

He grabs my hair and pulls me to my feet, only to kick the back of my legs and put me on my knee's. When he stands in front of me I try to fight back and swing for him, but I miss and fall down onto the ground face first.

"I knew you'd never be able to just stay up there as you were told." He uses his foot to kick me onto my back and smirks as he looks down at me. "I hope you like dark cells kid."

The last thing I see is Thread's armoured foot coming straight at my face before I blackout.


	3. Chapter 3

The only thing i can make out is my feet trailing along the floor behind me. I can feel two pairs of hands grabbing my arms and pulling me but i can't make them out when i open my eyes. I can also still feel the imprint of Thread's boot on my face. Fuck it hurts.

The blur across my vision starts to vanish when i'm dragged through a set of double doors that lead to Snow's office, the one i was trying to get into when Thread caught me. In there was Egeria, stood by Snow as he sat at his desk, and Commander Thread.

Judging by how quiet everything seems, i'm willing to bet the Victory Tour party is long finished. Shit it could have finished days ago for all i know. Though seeing how Snow is still wearing the same clothes - which he never does - i know it's only been a few hours at worst.

The two people carrying me drop me on the ground in front of Snow and take their leave. I'm still hoping for that bomb, seeing as i hate everybody in this room with me. So what if it kills me too. Death has to be better than what Snow is about to do to me.

"Commander Thread tells me you found yourself in an, adventurous, mood this evening." Snow, for awhile, just sits there and stares at me as pull myself to my knee's. "When i specifically told you, to stay away."

I don't say anything despite wanting too. I know my place. If i so much as murmur Threads fist will connect with my face again.

"Now i know you wouldn't be stupid enough to try and contact anybody from District Seven." Again he stares and waits. "So what exactly where you up too, i wonder."

It wasn't a question he was asking me directly, because he already knew the answer. He was just biding his time and playing with my head.

Snow reaches down and picks up a messily glued together scrap of paper off his desk - the one Powell gave me - with a small but wicked smile setting onto his face as he stood up and made his way over to stand in front of me.

Turning the paper around, he holds in front of my face. "Exactly what did you hope to achieve by breaking in here, hmm?"

I can't even answer that for myself other than i wasn't really thinking about what i was doing. So even if i wanted to give him an answer, i couldn't.

"You do not know?" He asks, almost laughing. "Maybe you are stupid enough to try and contact your 'friends'."

Yeah, i am. But not to contact them directly. I just hope he doesn't know about Powell.

Snow smiles down at the paper in his hands then retreats to sit back down in his chair at his desk. "You'll be overjoyed to know that Ms Mason rudely declined my generous offer, i'd imagine."

She did? I wish i could say that was a great thing. But the look on Snows face says he's anything but happy with what she's done and he won't let her get away with it.

"Do you agree with her decision?" Snow asks.

I say nothing.

"You shouldn't." He says when he realises i'm saying nothing. "Ms Mason was wrong to show defiance."

Fair to say i don't totally agree with that. Somebody had show him that he didn't own them eventually, the only problem i have with it is that Johanna will be the one to pay for it. If he hurts her i will kill him.

"Victors should be honoured to receive such duties." Snow cuts off my thoughts. "Only the most attractive get such an opportunity."

So what? Johanna should be honoured that he asked her to fuck anything walking because he says she is pretty? I think she'd be insulted.

"And when victors do not play ball, do you know what happens?" Snow continues on, purposely asking me that question because of my dad. "They pay with blood."

In a snap i'm off my knee's and go to charge forward saying, "If you hurt her...".

Thread is there just as quick, grabbing the back of my neck and forcing me onto my knee's yet again.

Snow starts smiling as Thread lets go of me. "Hurt her? No, that would be too easy."

After grabbing a small grey cube, Snow gets up again and sits on the edge of the desk in front of me. He places the grey cube at my eye level and activates the fairly large holographic screen.

The first thing i see is three people, also on their knee's only tied up with rope. They're all sobbing from what i can see, the man trying to calm the kid. I don't recall ever meeting them, but i can tell you that the women and the man, even the little boy look familiar. I then know why too.

The Mason's. It's easy to see now i look again. Johanna looks so much like both her mom and her dad it's unreal. Even her little brother looks like her.

Now it's hard to not know who they are, i start to feel the panic swelling in my gut as i realise exactly what is going on. More so when Thread walks over to each of them with a gun in his hand.

I try to look away, only Thread grabs my head and forces me to watch as he shoots each one of them point blank in the back of the head. After that he lets me look away.

There's no way Johanna knows yet, she won't even be back in Seven.

I hear Thread chuckle and can almost feel the grin eating away at Snow's face as i clench my fists together.

I don't want to believe he has done that to her family. But when the evidence is sitting right in front of you it's hard to convince yourself otherwise.

Who knows why he showed me that or what exactly he was expecting it to do to me. But i do know that this isn't what he wanted.

Before either Snow or Thread can notice i push myself off the ground, charge at Snow and hit him square in the face. I manage to get a second punch in before Thread has me on the ground punching the living daylights out of me.

"Enough!" Snow shouts about twenty punches later.

I can feel the blood covering and running down my face as Thread gets off me and pulls me to sit up. I'm surprised i'm even alive, yet alone able to sit up without support.

Snow is rubbing his busted lip, smirking at the sight of his own blood. Or maybe at my blood, it's covering the floor enough right now.

"There is one other thing." He says slowly as Egeria begins wiping to blood off his face with a tissue. "Commander Thread if you would, please."

Thread nods but doesn't leave my side. "Bring him in." He says into an earpiece.

As Thread grabs me to make sure i can't flip out again, the doors to the office open and two peacekeepers enter, dragging a lifeless Powell in with them.

No. No no no no no. What have i done?

"Your outside source, hmm?" Snow waves or Egeria. "After all i've done for you, this is how you repay my kindness. Resorting to nothing more than a lousy stylist to help you escape."

He crouches down in front of me, making Thread pull my arms behind my back tighter.

"You are going nowhere." Snow says. "And the list of people who die because of you, starts now."

He stands up and signals the peacekeeper on the right. The peacekeeper salutes, pulls out his gun and bang! Powell was already lifeless, they'd beaten him that bad. By shooting him, they had put him out of his misery.

It's my fault he is dead though. No matter if i want it to be false, it's the opposite.

"I was a fool to ever think you could become a true Snow." Snow sits down behind his desk one final time. "You will always be your fathers boy. A Dugald. A blight on my family name."

He doesn't say anything else, just cocks his head to the side as Thread starts dragging me away. The other two peacekeepers follow him.

I know where i'm going now and it's not back to that room in the mansion. I'm going to the grand torture fest under the training centre, the place nobody but Snow and high up officers know about.

The same place he killed my dad.  



	4. Chapter 4

The cell isn't dark, not really. Though the mood, the screams around you, it's all so very dark, you forget your in a brightly lit place.

I don't know how long i've been in here for. Weeks, months. I can't remember. I stopped counting after the fourth consecutive day of beatings at the hands of Thread and the others. I haven't eaten in who knows how long either, but i look at my thin arms and i know it's been a while. I'm deteriorating with each passing day. It gets harder and harder to raise my arms above my head, or to even gather the strength to crawl around the floor.

Wishing they would kill me was pointless. It had been made very clear to me that the only time death would be an option was when my body couldn't take anymore and just gave in. With each new day and new method of beating, i always think that it won't be long, but as evident i'm never right. My body doesn't give in and i live to be beaten another day. So far they've bludgeoned me batons, brayed me with their bare fists, cut me for fun and lashed me various times across the back with a leather whip. When i sleep at night i have to lay on my stomach - even if that too hurts - or the cuts and gashes along my back will send me into a world of unwanted and crippling pain.

As the regular peacekeeper comes to collect me, i start to wonder which method of torture they will use today. It can't be worse than the whipping, that is a pain i can't describe, especially when the whip is in the hands of Commander Thread. As always the peacekeeper comes in, grabs me roughly by the arm and forces me to stand up and walk on my own. Each step is painful for me, the hurt emitting in all parts of my body. Maybe today i'll finally be able give in.

The peacekeeper forces me into the chair in the centre of the white room. In the glass window above, i can make out Snows figure, stood watching me as he would whenever Thread had something to say to me. Which means the beating might not be so bad today.

"Ethan!" Thread walks over, grinning with his teeth showing. "Sorry i'm late."

I have no energy to say anything to him, haven't for a long time now.

"Not in the talking mood huh." His grin vanishes. "Neither am I."

He smacks me across the face with a baton, one that cuts my left cheek after it makes contact. My eyes glaze over for a second, blurring out everything around me and making my head pound.

Thread grabs my chin and forces me to look at him. "Where is Commander Wilks?"

That question. They've been asking me for so long and no matter how many times i told them i don't know they still asked. If they haven't heard from him or seem him then how do they expect me too? They know he's the one who had been helping me. Snow clearly didn't like it, and now he wanted Wilks' head.

When i don't answer Thread lashes me again, this time on the opposite cheek. They're definitely going to scar, that i know for certain. Still, i doubt i can look any worse then i do now, all skeletal and bloody.

"I won't ask you again!" Thread grabs my throat and towers over me.

I just look him in the eye and remain silent. He doesn't like that. His face inflames red as he gets angry and hits me again with the baton, this time on my kneecap.

I don't even scream out in pain no more. That noise is just music to Threads ears and its a song i'm playing no longer.

"Do you know how many methods i have to hurt you?" He asks. "Huh?!"

To Threads surprise a grin forms on my face and i muster my energy to say. "Go ahead." As the look of shock sets in i chuckle. "I can't give you an answer ... to a question i don't know."

Thread nods, mocking understanding, before he punches me so hard it sends the chair i'm sat on toppling to the floor, taking me with it.

From there i start crawling, only to be kicked forcefully in the stomach by Thread. After that i can't move, the pain going up my spine rendering me immobile.

"That's enough for today, Romulus." Snow says into a microphone that sounds through speakers around the room.

Thread does as he is told, leaving me to roll around on the floor until the pain is at least bearable. When i'm able to move a little more freely, Thread grabs my hair in his hands and drags me to feet.

"You'll answer one day." He growls quietly. "Otherwise i'll personally make sure everyday is hell for you."

He obviously hasn't noticed he's already doing that. If this isn't his idea of hell then i can't imagine what is.

"Move!" He shouts down my ear and pushes me along.

I limp all the way back to my cell with Thread occasionally pushing me from behind purposely, knowing my back was the most damaged part of my body. Once there i have to wait for him to open the cell door, when he has he grabs me and flings me in and i'm to weak to try and stop a hard landing. I crash into the side of the bed, back first, and for the first time in days let out a yelp of pain. Thread only locks the door and walks away laughing, leaving me unable to move cause the pain is too much to handle.

I lay there on the cell floor for hours, every time i tried to move it felt as though the cuts on my back were ripping open. In fact i'm almost sure one of them has, a specific area of my back feels cold yet warm. I try to move again, this time managing to pull myself into a sitting position. When i look behind me, the blood patches on the floor confirm my cuts have reopened slightly. Unfortunately, it's not enough to kill me.

I start falling asleep, the haziness across my vision telling me so. I'm trying to fight it, but i don't know why.

It's when i see somebody hurrying over to my cell that i wake up entirely.


	5. Chapter 5

"Come we have to get you out of here."

"Wilks?" I murmur.

"Get up! We don't have time to waste." Wilks runs over and puts my arm around his neck.

He pulls me to my feet gently and starts walking, allowing me to use him as support.

"I'm sorry i took so long." He whispers as we walk with quick pace. "But i had to make sure that i guaranteed your safety once you are out of here."

I can hear what he'a saying to me, though i find it hard to believe what's happening is real. I could be dreaming for all i know.

"I managed to contact a man, he has friends that can help you. Keep you hidden." Wilks opens a door with a keycard.

Without thinking, i push aside the thoughts of safety and being away from the Capitol to say. "Powell..."

"I know." Is all he says about it before continuing to pull me along the corridors whilst avoiding the patrolling peacekeepers. "There is a tunnel not far from here, the Commanders use it to dispose of dead prisoners. It leads to the edges of the Capitol."

"The fences..." Is all i can muster energy for.

There are fences that surround the Capitol, they act as trackers and detecters and are electrified. They've been there since the dark days rebellion as far as i'm aware. They were used to detect and target any incoming bombs that had been sent by District Thirteen.

"Don't worry about them." Wilks opens another door and then we round a corner. "My contact has everything under control, he'll get you out and get you to District Thirteen."

What? Thirteen is a nuclear wasteland, destroyed by the Capitol over seventy years ago. Why would i want to go there? Better yet how is it safe there?

"Thirteen?" I mumble.

"Long story." Wilks walks me over to a final door, its different from the others. "I'm sure everything will be explained to you."

The doors open and reveals a long dark tunnel and a foul stench from within. At the end of said tunnel is a tiny spot of light, i'm assuming it's the exit but it's hard to tell. Wilks continues to support me until we're inside the tunnel, at which he stands me up on my own and i lean against the tunnel wall.

"Here you'll need this." He hands me a strange looking disc of some sort. "A man named Plutarch Heavensbee is waiting just a little further forward once you exit the tunnel. Get to him, he'll help you."

"Wait what about you?" I ask weakly taking the disc from him.

"I'm covering your escape." Wilks then walks out of the tunnel and back into the prison.

"They'll kill you..." I go to grab him but after i almost fall over i think twice about it.

"It's a risk i'm willing to take." He starts closing the door. "Hurry, they won't wait forever."

Why? My life isn't important! So why risk his life to save me?

"Thank you." Is all i say to him, arguing will not change his mind, that i know.

"Go!" He says and closes the door.

I'm left in complete darkness once the door closes, the only light as far as i can see is the spot right at the end. Who knows how far this tunnel stretches? How long i'll be walking for, or if i can even get that far. Heck for all i know i'm still dreaming. This all seems to good to be real. I'm finally able to escape, to put the Capitol behind me. But if this is a dream, then why am i being sent to District Thirteen? Surely if i was dreaming, i'd be going home to Seven. Regardless, i start moving towards the spec of light, using the wall as support to keep me up right and moving.

As i move the spec starts getting bigger and bigger. Then thoughts creep in as to whether i'm dead or not. But seeing as i'm still hurting like crazy, that can't be it. More limping along, and i'm sure i can here wind bouncing against a metal surface further down. Then i start smelling fresh air, instead of death and rotten flesh. That's another thing, i'm walking on dead bodies and dusty bones, i can't see it but i know it. I'm not wearing shoes either.

The ground gets a lot more solid, and through the once just a spec of light i can see the outside and the glowing red lights on the fence that surrounds the Capitol. Maybe i'm not dreaming after all. With a sudden burst of adrenaline i start walking faster, ignoring just how my body hurts to do so. I start laughing to myself once i'm outside, the fresh air must have gotten to my head. It has to be around midnight, seeing as the moon is dead centre in the sky. What a great night for an escape right? I look down at my feet as i start walking again, looking for this Heavensbee guy that Commander Wilks mentioned. They're covered in what i can only make as dried blood and dust. In fact my entire body is. More of a reason to be glad i couldn't see what was in that tunnel.

I'm not moving for much longer, then i see a small, chubby blonde haired man, in his late forties maybe, stood by the fences waiting, concealed in the darkness. All my instincts say that that's Plutarch Heavensbee. Behind him is a hovercraft, i'm betting that's what the wind was bouncing off. I limp over to them as fast as possible, not daring to slow down in case i miss my opportunity to get out. Plutarch see's me heading over and takes a few steps forward, a small grin on his face.

"You made it." His grin becomes a smile. "Plutarch Heavensbee." He holds out his hand.

Shaking his hand, i forget to say my own name and just ask. "Why help me?"

To that he chuckles. "Not all of us support Snow and the Hunger Games." He lets go of my hand. "My own experience as Head Gamemaker ... Opened my eyes to the facts. Besides, Wilks spent months trying to help you on his own, i decided to help."

He was a gamemaker? I don't remember him. Maybe i wasn't old enough to care.

Things are silent between us as i ponder on his words more, at least they're silent until a third man jumps out of the hovercraft. He was a dark man, in his early forties. His head was shaven completely to the point the moonlight shined of it and he had dark brown eyes, a similar colour to his skin.

"We have to go." He says. "We'll miss our window otherwise."

"Of course." Plutarch was still smiling.

"Come with me." The dark man says and helps me walk to the hovercraft and board it.

Plutarch follows but he doesn't step on board. "You have the disc?" He asks.

Hurrying, i pull the disc out of my trouser pocket and show it to him, to which he smiles again.

"That right there is your bargaining chip." He says. "When you get to thirteen, give it to President Coin. That way she'll know you can be trusted."

I want to ask exactly what it is but doubt i'd get a straight answer, especially off this Plutarch.

"Thank you." I say.

"Don't mention it." He nods to me, then to the other man stood at my side. "Until we meet again Ethan."

The engines flare up and the bridge begins to close. Plutarch remains stood there watching us the entire time, still smiling. You get to wonder if it's just the people of the Capitol, they're just naturally happy. Considering he saved my life and i'm thankful, i don't really know what to think of Heavensbee. He seems like he has a good heart, but everybody from the Capitol has a dark side, no matter how nice they are. Or maybe he is generally just a nice person and my time in the Capitol with Snow has just made me think they're all self centred bastards.

"Come on, you should sit down." The dark man helps me over to the seats. "We have a while before we get to thirteen, so use it to rest up, conserve your energy."

I nod.

The man sits down in the seat across from me. "Name's Boggs. Nice to meet you."

"Ethan." I say. "Thanks for doing this."

"In Thirteen we will take all the help we can get." Boggs sits forward in his chair. "President Coin is eager to meet you. It's not everyday somebody close to Snow rebels against him."

"I'm not ... not close to him." I mumble as i look down. "I've spent the last ... who knows how long, taking beatings of his thugs."

"That much is obvious." He nods. "I'm sorry for whatever they put you through." He adds sincerely.

I don't reply to him.

"Fence going down in three, two, one." A voice calls out over the speakers.

With a swift jerk the hovercraft begins gliding through the air, and i'm assuming passes through the fences and out of the Capitol.

"How did you guys shut down the fence?" I ask, i thought it was impossible to tamper with it.

"We didn't." Boggs replies. "The sectors of the fence run for miles. On the other end, a hovercraft containing a new batch of peacekeepers from District Two is arriving, meaning they shut down the sector briefly. Long enough for us to get out."

Huh. This all sounds as though it's been well planned. Though i'm not sure why anybody would go through this amount of trouble to get me out.

"Commander Wilks spent a long time planning this." It was as though Boggs read my mind. "He was determined to get you to safety."

Odds are he'll die at the hands of Snow because he helped me. Another name to add to that list of people who die because of me.

Trying to take my mind off of that topic i ask. "How long has it been since the last night of the Victory Tour? For the seventy first games?"

Boggs sighs. "We marked the end of the seventy second Hunger Games five months ago."

Holy shit. I knew it had been a while but ... That means six or seven months i've been down there. For that amount of time all they've done is starve me and beat the shit out of me.

"District Two won." Boggs adds. "A boy named Eugene."

The regular career victor. I bet Snow was overjoyed.

"How did Seven do?" I ask just to keep the conversation going.

Boggs thought on for a moment then answered. "The boy died in the bloodbath. The girl placed sixth overall, killed by a career from District One."

At least we were in the top ten. I wonder who out of Blight and Johanna trained the two of them.

"The games lasted just over six days." He continues. "It's one for the books apparently."

"Is that according to Snow?" I ask coldly.

"No." Boggs shakes his head. "The new head gamemaker, Seneca Crane. He made an entrance the Capitol won't soon forget."

Seneca Crane? He sounds like more of an idiot than Juan Burtching, and we all know what happened to him.

"Boggs, the President is on the line." One of the pilots shouts out from the cabin.

Boggs nods and gets up, but before he leaves he says to me. "Get some sleep. I'll wake you when we arrive."

I just nod as he walks into the cockpit and closes the door, leaving me in the hangar alone. I half expected to fall asleep and awaken in the cell of the Capitol with Commander Thread stood towering over me. But no. When i woke up, i was still there in the hovercraft, with Boggs stood over me. Not Thread. It was real. I was free from the Capitol. I can hardly believe it. But i'm free.

"Welcome to District Thirteen." Boggs says to me as we step in the descending lift.

It was incredible. District Thirteen was real, still here and in no way destroyed by the Capitol. It was just hidden, under the remnants of the original District. This whole place was one big underground hideout. Bustling with people all going about their daily business. Though the entire place seems militarised, it's a damn sight better than the Capitol. I say militarised because people are walking in a soldier like posture, they are lining up in structured forms to get to places and their doesn't seem to be a family in sight.

"President Coin is waiting to meet you in her office." Boggs puts his hand behind his back, further solidifying my statement of the military like structure here. "My advice, be polite and don't argue with her."

"Sure." I say, not looking at him because i'm too distracted by the view as we descend further.

When the elevator stops on the bottom floor I follow Boggs out and through the long hallways, various turns and doors until we reach what i'm assuming is President Coin's office. I couldn't have been more right in my assertions. The moment we enter i'm greet by an elder women, in her fifties, long grey hair but along the sides at the front it was white. The way she held herself practically screamed she was the one in power around here and she knew it.

"You must be Ethan Snow." Her fragile yet stern voice calls out to me and she walks over.

"Mayne." I correct her. "I'm not a Snow."

The way she smiled at me suggested she liked the fact i had corrected her.

"Regardless, Plutarch has told me you'll be nothing but beneficial to us here." Her eyes examine me. "Though i think you'll need awhile to recover from your time in the Capitol prisons."

Considering i look like a bloodied up skeleton, yeah, i'd have to agree with her on that.

"But once you are deemed fit enough, you will receive proper training and be enlisted into our militia." Coin smiles.

I should've known there would be a price to pay for my rescue. But honestly, if these guys are taking the fight to Snow anytime soon, i'll gladly fight for them.

"Plutarch also said you'd be arriving with helpful information for us?" It was a question, one i'm not entirely sure i have an answer for. At least until i recall Plutarch's final words to me, it's a pretty clear answer then.

"I have." I pull out the disc from my pocket and slowly hand it over to her.

"Excellent." She takes the disc out of my shaking hands and smiles. "Allow me to officially declare you a citizen of District Thirteen, Mr Mayne."

"Thank you, madam President." I remember how Boggs told me to be polite.

With a curt nod of her head to me, she turns to Boggs and says. "Could you make sure Ethan here is treated correctly for his wounds at the hospital."

"Yes President Coin." Is Boggs' reply with a nod.

"Make sure he gets a good meal in him too." Is that last thing she says before walking away from us.

"Of course." Boggs says then turns to me. "Lets go kid."

I got to admit, the hospitality here is something else. So far President Coin seems a kind enough women and has the respect of Boggs no doubt. I hope i recover fast and i'm deemed fit enough to train, because now the opportunity has been put in front of me, i want to fight Snow. I want to stop him and the Hunger Games. I want the Districts to be a better place, to stop families being torn apart each year and maybe, just maybe, i can find a way to protect my family and Johanna from Snow.

This here, District Thirteen ... It's my chance to make a difference and you can bet your ass i'm taking it.


	6. Chapter 6

Two months. That was all it took for me to recover and the doctors to give me the all clear. In two months i went from being severely under weight, to a strong and fit enough fighter to train with the new recruits.

That takes longer, longer than a year. The seventy third Hunger Games wrapped up with the victory tour in the Capitol three weeks ago. The victor hailed from District Five, Talion, his name. He won by killing other tributes with a rock, seeing as the gamemakers declined the option of weapons for that year.

In the Capitol and the other Districts, they are preparing for the seventy forth games, the Reaping being just a few hours away. Everybody was especially excited in the Capitol this year. Why? Well, these games will followed by a Quarter Quell. A special Hunger Games which take place every twenty five years. Now the years before the Quarter Quells always get the Capitol people hyped up, because most of the time, the Head Gamemakers want to set a standard to Snow. To show him that they can create the most exciting games and will do wonders with a Quarter Quell. I've been watching all the promotional videos put out by the Capitol for the games when i'm not training. Each and every one of them noting how this year will set the bar for next. Though none of it is really important to me or to anybody here in thirteen.

Lunch time is held earlier today, because of the Reaping. Each and everyone of us is expected to watch at least the Reaping, as a reminder that Snow is an enemy who needs to be stopped and if the Hunger Games don't make you want to kill him, then you shouldn't be here. At two fifty five sharp Boggs collects me and we walk to the cafeteria, there the Reapings from each District will be shown to us. You might ask well why does Boggs collect me personally. Well, Coin had given him the duty to teach me to fight properly and use a firearm. If i'm honest, the fact it's Boggs training me is the reason why i'm doing so well and advancing faster then the other recruits. Why i get the special treatment? My only answer comes in the form that it's related to me being Snow's blood and the fact i have a few dirty secrets on him that nobody else has. So being related to that bastard has its benefits.

We chose a table and sit down at it. I don't bother getting food because i'm not hungry and neither does Boggs.

When the footage starts rolling, the first District we go to is District One. Both their tributes were volunteers. Marvel was the boy and Glimmer was the girl - both pretty and pampered just as you'd expect from the district of luxury. In District Two yet another two volunteers, Cato and Clove. Now the Cato guy, he looked mean, stocky and able. He was already a fan favourite and you knew it. In hindsight, so was the girl, Clove. District Five gave a female tribute with orange hair, Caesars skittish comments made it hard to hear her actual name.

When District Seven came up i was too distracted watching Johanna at the side of the stage to even notice the tributes had been called out. I didn't know either of them. The male tribute wasn't Reg or one of my brothers thankfully. As for Johanna, she looked different. Stronger was the word i'd use. When the camera gave viewers a close up of her and Blight, all i could see her in her eyes was the inability to care about what was going on around her. I'm almost thankful when the screen cuts away from District Seven and goes to Eight, it meant i couldn't over think about exactly what was going on in Johanna's mind. Cause i know for certain it can't have been good.

The rest of the Districts take their turn, only up until District Eleven none of them are memorable. From that District was Rue. Twelve years old and selected for the games with nobody volunteering in her place. And a big guy named Thresh. Another contender this year based on his massive frame.

But District Twelve, that is where things get really interesting.

After all the video bullshit and prattling on by their new escort Effie Trinket, the female tribute was selected. Primrose Everdeen. The whole cafeteria began to lose interest, that was until another girl, with long braided brown hair, began screaming and volunteered as tribute. Her name was Katniss Everdeen. Primroses sister. It was this act of desperation by Katniss that caught every bodies attention. Even Caesar Flickerman had no words to describe what he had seen. A volunteer from an outline district is rare. A volunteer from District Twelve? It's never happened in all the years of the games. Until now.

This girl. This Katniss Everdeen. She had my vote to win based on that one moment. I think, going off the silence by Boggs, she had his vote too. She was certainly going to be remembered. Just as it was certain that Snow would not like the fact the games hadn't even started and already an outline district was all anybody would be talking about.

In other news, the male tribute from Twelve was a small boy, with dirty blond hair all gelled back. His name was Peeta Mellark, but other than the fact he was chosen, he didn't stand out much against his female counterpart. After the footage was over, it was like Caesar had forgotten the other districts existed, all he could talk about was Everdeen. How it pulled at the heart strings when she volunteered for her sister.

"Sounds like they already have a favourite." Comments Boggs.

"Yeah." I chuckle. "Being from Twelve, Snow isn't going to like it."

"Too bad for him." Boggs shakes his head. "Come on, we train now you can have the evening off."

I don't argue with him or anything, i just jump straight up and follow him. It'll be nice to be able to have some free time.

As promised, Boggs finished up what he was teaching me - mostly methods of defence - and then allowed me to go back to my room early.

Once there i shower up before my roommate Hansen shows his face and decides to hog the shower for hours.

I usually don't look in the mirror in the bathroom, mostly because the scars that mark my body remind me of how they'd hurt me in the Capitol. Especially on my back, those scars ran deep and took the longest to heal to a point where the doctors were pleased. I have them everywhere mind, not just my back. The ones on either side of my face came from Thread and his baton. The one on my abdomen marks my time in the arena, courtesy of Marric sticking that huge ass knife in my gut. Twenty one years old and i have more scars and stories to tell than most people double my age. I'm not so sure if its a good thing.

"Ethan!" Hansen runs into the bathroom, still hyper as always.

He's from the Capitol originally. Turns out Plutarch helped a lot of people get out or they escaped themselves. Hansen i believe escaped on his own with a few others. His tattoos all down his arms and various piercings mark him as a former Capitol too, but unlike them he styled them in a way to make himself look tougher than he actually is. Those are his words too, not mine.

"Did you see that stuff at the Reaping today?" He asks frantically, hopping as he follows me out of the bathroom.

"Yeah." I sit down on my bed. "The Everdeen girl."

"Yeah her." Hansen sits down on his own bed. "Some of the others broke down after what she did."

"It was something alright." I nod. "The very first volunteer from Twelve in seventy four years."

"It's inspiring." He laughs. "Imagine if she wins."

"She probably won't. Snow won't like that she's from Twelve." I say all to quickly. "But if she does, it'll be something. I mean if a girl from District Twelve can win then... Who knows right?"

"Yeah." Hansen nods smiling at the thought. "You coming down to Elliots room for a game of Adder with the others?"

"Yeah. I'll ugh, meet you there." I scratch my cheek which is starting to grow stubble again.

"Okay, see you in a bit." Hansen gets up and runs out of the room.

Now i think on what i said more, it would be nice, to finally see somebody other than the regulars win. Especially if it was an underdog like Everdeen. I say underdog because even though the Capitol will like her, she is still from District Twelve. I hope she proves them wrong though, that'll be like waving a big screw you to President Snow himself.

Now that. That would be hilarious.

The next few days Boggs lets me finish training early so i could watch the games, or more the build up to the actual games starting. I'm watching for Katniss Everdeen. After her reaping, i found myself wanting to see exactly what she does in the days building up to the games.

At the tribute parade both she and her fellow tribute stole the show thanks to their new stylists. Their outfit was black leather, a cape attached to the back of both costumes which was engulfed in flame. They were all anybody was watching and again were the only District that Caesar Flickerman and Claudius Templesmith could speak of. They were stealing this years games and they were only a day in. After the parades things went quiet on Twelves progress, though everybody in the Capitol had begun nicknaming Katniss the "Girl on Fire". It was meant both literally and not. She was on fire at the tribute parade, but she was also on fire in a sense that she was doing everything right.

The next time we heard anything, a few days after the parades, was when the individual scores were revealed. When Cato and Clove from two both got tens, you'd think they'd be pinned as the ultimate favourites. They were, until the highest score of the 74th Games was given. Katniss stole the show yet again, scoring a high of eleven from the gamemakers. Yet another factor to consider when you took in her nickname of Girl on Fire. She was something special and everybody here in thirteen knew it. Every time her name was mentioned people stopped what they were doing to watch. It was guaranteed, every time.

It was on the day before the games started that i met up with Boggs for a final test of training that when complete would allow me to join the militia. When i got to him, he was talking with none other than President Coin, and they too were talking about Katniss Everdeen. Trying not to interrupt, i stood back and hid around a corner.

"We can't guarantee anything." I heard Coin say. "This girl might have everybodies attention now, but it means nothing unless she wins."

"I know, Madam President." Boggs says respectably. "It was just an opinion."

Coin continues. "One girl wearing fake flames can excite a crowd and nothing more."

"Of course."

I only caught the tail end of the conversation, as is apparent. But it was enough to send my mind spiralling with questions and theories. I intended to ask Boggs, once i'd gotten through the exam. That's just what i did. As soon as the test finished i chased after Boggs. Intent on getting some answers no matter what they were.

"You shouldn't have heard any of that." Boggs says.

He didn't appear to like the fact i'd eavesdropped on his conversation with Coin.

"Well i did." I dodge a trainee who is running down the corridor. "You might as well tell me?"

He stops walking and so do I. "It was just an opinion Ethan. Let it go."

I know that look on Boggs' face right now, it means don't keep treading down this line of conversation.

"Okay." I admit defeat.

"Good." He looks at his watch and sighs. "It's almost lunch, go there and stick to your schedule for today. I'll get back to you once the test is evaluated."

"Thanks Boggs." I nod as he starts walking away from me.

I look down at my tattooed schedule for the day on my arm. After lunch i have duties working on hovercraft repairs. I think Hansen and some of the others work in there. When two hours of that are up i have a half hour downtime before i'm expected in the hospital for a check up. From there it's as simple as return to quarters. Not the most eventful day, but it's better than doing nothing i suppose. It'll all change once i'm officially enlisted in the militia, Coin has already told me i'd be working alongside Boggs. Again the special treatment is showing but I'm not going to compalin about it.

At the end of the day why would I?


	7. Chapter 7

A few weeks later and the seventy fourth hunger games are all everybody is talking about. Even President Coin has taken more of a notice. The signs of rebellion. They're there, all spurting up inside the Girl on Fire. We can all see it, and if they look close enough the districts will too.

There is already reports of riots in District Eleven. After their tribute Rue was killed by Marvel, Katniss laid flowers around her body, showing she generally cared for this young girl. Then she turned to the cameras and gave a three finger salute - a symbol of respect used by those in District 12 - it was intended for Rue's district but it also mocked the Capitol whether Katniss knew it or not and it certainly incited the riots in Eleven.

As for the games themselves, they're almost at an end now. If one of the four remaining tributes out of Cato and Thresh were to win, they'd be crowned as a singular victor. But because Katniss and Peeta are from the same District they'll both be crowned victors thanks to a slight rule change by the gamemakers. I'm assuming this is because the Capitol have fallen in love with the lovers from twelve - yeah they're in love apparently - and killing even one of them would likely make the Capitolians themselves riot. I should've thought of using this tactic with Johanna during our games, who knows what might've been now.

I was currently sitting in President Coin's Office, watching the games with Boggs and the President herself. Ever since i passed my tests, Coin has kept me close at hand. I'm still unsure as to why, but being in my current position means i get the news on everything. On the large screen in front of the meeting table, the finale of the seventy fourth games is continuing on. They're following Katniss and Peeta mostly, but occasionally they do switch to the other tributes still in the games. Especially when they release mutts around the arena, giant dog like creatures each sporting a resemblance to the fallen tributes. The boy from Eleven was fighting with Cato from District Two, but he doesn't last long when three of the creatures jump on him, they practically tear him apart limb for limb. Cato managed to break into a run heading for the cornucopia, but the mutts chase him all the way.

With only three tributes remaining you just knew the Gamemakers were going to try and push them all to meet up at the cornucopia and end this. What better way to do that then with the mutts chasing them there. Both Katniss and Peeta are very nearly caught by them as they climb up onto the top of the cornucopia, but when they're up there the mutts are the least of their worries. Cato was laying in wait for them and he put up a hell of a fight before finally grabbing Peeta and using him to shield himself from the arrow Katniss had trained on them.

"Go ahead. I'm dead anyway. Always was right." He looks up to the sky and shouts. "Is that what they want to hear, huh?!."

Peeta is struggling against the grip Cato has around him, but apparently can't find the strength in him to throw him off. Regardless, Katniss does not lower her aim. When Cato looks back down at Katniss he laughs and tightens his grip around Peeta's neck, moving his hands so it would only take a simple tug to snap the neck.

"Nah nah. I can still do this." He nods and tightens his grip even further. "I can still do this."

There's a pause as Cato and Katniss stare each other down, but it doesn't last long. The second Cato actually moves to snap Peeta's neck, Katniss releases the arrow. It cuts straight through the air and lodges itself in the centre of Cato's hand. He then proceeds to losing his grip on Peeta, who then elbows Cato in the stomach, sending the final career tribute tumbling off the cornucopia and down into the mutts. There was no way Cato would live, even if the mutts let him be, which they didn't, not until Katniss put the poor guy out of his misery. At which point the mutts lost interest and began retreating back into the trees.

"Unbelievable." Coin smiles ever so slightly as she watches the victors of the seventy fourth games climb down off the cornucopia. "Two victors it's..."

Claudius Templesmith's voice on the tv cut Coin off. Where we thought he would announce them as the victors, instead he surprised us all. "Attention tributes." He says. "The previous rule change stating that two victors will be crowned from the same district has been, revoked ... Only one may be crowned victor."

The conniving bastards must have felt like genius' for that sucker punch. They had Twelve believe they could both go home only to destroy the notion of them being able to be together in the end. Snow had very clearly had his say in the matter and he didn't want to make hero's out of these two. I wonder if he'll make a martyr by killing one of them?

We were waiting for either Mellark or Everdeen to turn on the other but a death didn't come. Instead of fighting Peeta to the death, Katniss pulls out small, dark berries from her pocket. Nightlock. She mutters something we can't here to Peeta as she pours some of the berries in his hands. Katniss showed earlier on that she knew of nightlock and what it did to those who consumed it. So now, as she and Peeta both raised these berries to their mouths, it was an act of defiance. That these two would rather commit suicide than lose one another to the games will make the Capitol look stupid. They have to have a victor, otherwise where is the justice? Where is the kindness and generosity of the Capitol? It doesn't exist without a show pony.

It's all very poetic.

"Stop! Stop!" Templesmith was panicking, if they had no victor at all how bad would that look. "Ladies and gentleman, the winners of the seventy fourth Hunger Games."

All three of us were completely silent as a hovercraft collected both tributes from Twelve and air lifted them out.

"President Snow isn't going to like this." Boggs comments after the cameras leave the arena and pan to Caesar Flickerman.

"That two of the games underdogs won?" Coin nods. "Yes. But i'm more interested in how he reacts to the girl pulling out those berries. Suicide is frowned upon by the Capitol."

"Do you think people will take this as a sign?" I ask. I hope it is, with each day that passes i want to take the fight to Snow more and more.

Coin stares at me briefly and shakes her head eventually. "It's not enough to go on just yet, but it is a start."

Thats good enough for now i suppose. Now all we need is for others to start showing the Capitol they do not own them. Sooner rather than later.

Katniss Everdeen has shown them they can. They just have to be brave enough to see it.


	8. Chapter 8

It was months that passed after that that went uneventful. The occasional rumour of rebellion in the districts was nothing more than that. There was no proof that anybody was ready to fight. Things seemed to be dying down, going back to what we'd call normal. Then there was the riots across two separate districts just a few weeks away from the victory tour. President Coin still said it wasn't enough, that we needed something special before we act. This is despite what both Boggs and I were saying when we voiced our opinions.

It's a few days after the first of the riots in District Eleven have started and first thing we wake up to is Plutarch Heavensbee vid calling from the Capitol. He too agreed this was our chance.

"One girl is not enough to inspire a nation!" Coin argues.

"Madam President, Katniss Everdeen is more than just a girl. She is a symbol." States Plutarch calmly. "If she can incite the people to riot against the Capitol, she can inspire them to fight."

"And how would we do it?" Coin asks much calmer. "Like you said, Snow is watching her every move and is already planning on dealing with her. We'd never get close enough."

"You worry yourself too much, President Coin." Plutarch laughs. "I've already thought this through, many times and i have a plan."

"Then share it and don't keep wasting our time." She demands harshly.

I'll tell you what. Since being assigned as her bodyguard or whatever i am, i've noticed how she isn't as nice and approachable as she first seems when you meet her. Though i think her heart is in the right place, something just doesn't ring right.

"I've been appointed as Head Gamemaker. With the Quarter Quell coming up it's our chance to make a statement." Plutarch is smiling wildly.

"I'm not interested in the Hunger Games, Plutarch." Coin sighs.

"Ah but that is my plan, madam President." He still doesn't let his smile falter. "Quarter Quells are special, therefore they demand something truly incredible." The smile grew somehow. "I'm thinking we put Katniss back into the games."

I'm not sure how much of a plan that is, not one that will work in our favour at least. Odds are she goes back, Snow will make sure she doesn't return. Be it through the other tributes killing her off or some contraption invented by the Capitol.

"How would you do that?" Boggs asks, looking just as skeptical as my thoughts are.

"Simple." Plutarch chuckles. "All the tributes in the Quarter Quell will be reaped from the current pool of victors. Katniss is District Twelves only female victor, she'll go back in and we work to get her out and show that this is the time for rebellion."

That sounds even worse. The majority of the victors are power houses. The careers' first move would be to hunt down Katniss Everdeen and slaughter her. Not to mention this also throws Johanna back in the face of danger, she's District Sevens only female victor. Just as Blight is our only male. They'll both know they're going back in before a Reaping even takes place.

"Won't the other victors pose a threat to Everdeen?" Boggs asks Plutarch the question on my mind.

"They would, but the majority of them have many reasons to hate the Capitol." Plutarch began counting on his fingers. "Finnick Odair, Haymitch Abernathy, Johanna Mason and Peeta Mellark are the main names that come to mind."

I could definitely defend that saying as far as Johanna goes. Maybe even Finnick, i mean, i know how Snow makes him sell his body and if he refuses threatens to hurt Annie Cresta, another victor from four. Then again i also know Haymitch lost somebody he cared about because of Snow. Peeta is an obvious ally, because of Katniss.

"If we get them on board, we can form an alliance to keep Katniss alive and get her out."

"They won't be enough to defend her against the likes of Brutus, and the majority of the career victors are just as well built as him." Coin points it out.

I take my chance to speak once i think i see what Plutarch has in his plan. "It won't just be them. I know for a fact Blight will follow Johanna, whoever she's with so is he. I'd imagine it's the same with Finnick and the other victors from four."

"Exactly." Plutarch nods at me and smiles.

"If we were to lose her, the "Mockingjay" as you call her then everything we'll have planned will be for nought. It's too risky, Plutarch."

"Madam President this may be the only opportunity we get to do this." Plutarch finally stops smiling. "If Snow wins this time, nobody will ever find the courage to rise up against him. You know that. Taking risks is the only way we will ever know if Panem can truly be different."

I'm thankful this guy knows how to stir your emotions with words, otherwise i doubt President Coin would ever agree to this plan.

"I won't push you for an answer President Coin." Plutarch stands up. "There's more Capitol deserters arriving in thirteen. Hear what they have to say about our Mockingjay, then tell me you don't think this can work."

With that Plutarch cuts off the vid call from his end and leaves the three of us sat in silence. Just a quick glance over to Boggs and i know he likes the sound of this plan. A glance to Coin however and i'm not even sure what she thinks anymore.

"Ethan." She says. "Go to the hangars and wait for these Capitol deserters. Bring them here the moment they arrive."

"Of course." I get up out of the chair i was sat in and head for the door. Boggs and Coin start discussing and planning as i leave.

In the hangar the engineers are all running about pushing heavy carts full of scrap metal and broken hovercraft parts, shouting to one another to hurry and get them to the smelters. In the centre though is a newly landed hovercraft, i can tell by the warmth radiating around it off the engines. Hansen is stood at the foot of the hovercraft as the bridge lowers, waiting to go inside and check everything is in order. I jog over and stand beside him.

The bridge hits the floor and after smiling to acknowledge me Hansen goes on board with his clipboard in hand. I lose interest in what he's doing when i see four new faces get out of their seats and walk down the bridge towards me. One is a woman, with blonde hair shaven on one side and a tattoo of green vines running down the side of her face and neck. The other three are men. One is short and tanned, his head shaven and piercings everywhere. Another is fairly tall, with orange hair and a fluffy orange beard. The final guy has dark hair and a beard, he's stocky and looks similar to the red headed one.

As the women stops before me i say. "You're the deserters Plutarch mentioned?"

She looks down at her clothes and chuckles. "Does the dress give it away?"

All those bright colours and shapes on her outfit, yeah i guess the dress would give it away if i didn't already know wouldn't it.

Smiling she holds out her hand and says. "I'm Cressida. This is Messalla." She points at the tanned male with the piercings. "That there is Castor." Then at the dark haired one with the beard.

The two men walk over and shake my hand saying hello and how they're glad to be here.

"What about him?" I ask pointing to the red head.

Castor is the one to answer. "This is my brother, Pollux."

Pollux walks over smiling and offers out his hand. I take it and smile back. "Nice to meet you."

I feel a little insulted when he doesn't say anything to me, he just continues smiling.

"He can't answer you with words." Cressida sighs. "Courtesy of Snow, Pollux here is an Avox."

An Avox? I suppose that explains a lot. Mainly it gives me an idea on exactly why the brothers opted to leave the Capitol, their home, and join us here District Thirteen.

"I'm sorry to hear that." I say to Pollux. "But we'll make Snow pay for it."

Pollux is smiling, but it's the reaction of the others that catches my attention. They all act as though they'd heard something as close to music to their ears.

Cressida looks between her friends and says to me. "So you're doing it?"

"Doing what?" I ask looking between them all.

"Rebellion?" Messalla steps forward.

If only that were true. "If it were up to me, yeah we would be. But until President Coin says otherwise, i'm afraid not."

The look on their faces is suggesting that they're questioning their decision to come here. I don't want that. These four, even if i've only met them just now, see the same chance to fight as i do, as Boggs and Plutarch do. If Coin see's this then she'll know Katniss Everdeen is our only opportunity to change Panem forever or die trying. Either way it's like what Plutarch said, we may never get another chance if Snow puts Everdeen down.

"Speaking of which. The President asked that i bring you to her immediately." I fling my head in the direction of the elevator.

Cressida nods. "Lead the way..." She looks at me waiting for a name.

"Ethan." I say.

"Ethan." She smiles.

"This way." I start walking, the four of them follow me.

I actually chuckle to myself as we step in the elevator, gaining a strange look from everyone but Pollux. I just find it strange, how almost three years ago this was me in their position and Boggs in mine. A reminder of how far i've come from that skinny, beaten nineteen year old that stood in this elevator wishing he was dead in some respect. Now i've never wanted to be alive so much in my life.

When we stop on the ground floor, we all step out of the elevator and i lead them towards Coin's office. Cressida walks just at my side and the others walk together in line behind.

"If you don't mind me asking, your surname, it's Mayne right?" Cressida asks as we reach the corridor that leads to the office.

"It is." I nod.

It's also - in a way - Dugald, my real fathers surname. Though i've gone by Mayne my whole life up to now, so i'll stick by that until i die.

"Why do you ask?" I'm curious enough to question.

"I watched you die during the seventy first Hunger Games." She says it quietly, despite almost everyone who matters in Thirteen knowing the truth. I forgot she has just arrived here.

"A lot of people assume they did." I shrug. "But i'm not dead am I."

"Clearly not." She chuckles. "I'm curious as to why and how."

We reach Coin's office, just in time too. "It's a long story." Is the last thing i say to Cressida before opening the door and leading them inside. "Madam President."

Coin stands up from the meeting table, a smile on her face and walks over to us.

"Ethan, i take these are the deserters." Her eyes flash between me and the others.

"They are President Coin." I turn sideways and point at each of them as i say. "This is Cressida, Castor, Messalla and Pollux."

"A pleasure to meet you all." Coin shakes the hands of each of them and then invites them to sit down around the table.

I remain stood up behind where they're seated, putting my foot against the wall so i can push myself away faster if needed. But it won't be. These people aren't here to attack us, i know it.

"So, Plutarch Heavensbee tells me you're all here in support of Katniss Everdeen?" Coin puts her hands together.

Cressida is the one to speak up, confirming she's the leader of the four of them. "We are. She showed the Capitol, showed Snow, that they don't control anybody."

"That she did." Coin nods. "But President Snow won't let her get away with it."

"We know that." Cressida sighs. "But if the rebels, if you, were able to get Katniss to District Thirteen and put her at the head of a rebellion, the whole of Panem will follow and rise up to overthrow the Capitol."

President Coin doesn't say anything, only continues to watch as Cressida's eyes burn with admiration as she speaks of Everdeen.

"I've heard people talk, we all have." Cressida looks between her three friends. "Even those who claim loyalty to Snow and the Capitol admire the girl on fire beyond normal means. She convinced us to leave the Capitol and fight to change Panem rather than sitting back and hoping somebody else will do it for us."

I hope Coin is listening, i mean really listening, to what Cressida is saying to her hear, because it's not just these four who feel this way.

"If one act of rebellion from her can break the system we all lived by." Cressida sits forward, that spark in her eyes yet again. "Then she could lead us to victory over the Capitol with the right support. Your support, Madam President."

It's a pretty good sign when Coin sits in a quiet debate with herself and then nods her head with a genuine smile on her face - a rare sight.

"Thank you for telling me this." She says and then stands up. "I will think on what you have said to me. For now, allow me to welcome you to District Thirteen. My assistant Boggs will show you around and explain what will be expected of you in the days to come."

Cressida and the others also stand up and bow their heads. "Thank you, it's an honour to be here." Says Cressida.

At that moment in time Boggs walks in the room and salutes President Coin before telling the others to follow him. I go to follow them but i'm stopped by President Coin placing a hand on my shoulder from behind me.

"Stay. I want to ask you something Ethan." She says then walks me over to the table and tells me to sit down.

I do as she asks and wait for her to sit down in the chair in front of me.

"What do you think of this talk about Everdeen?" She asks. "I want you to be honest with me."

"Honestly." I sigh. "I think this is the best chance we're ever going to get. After seeing the effect she's had just by pulling out those berries, i agree with Cressida. We make her the face of a rebellion and others will follow simply because she is a symbol that the Capitol can be defied."

Coin is silent for a moment as she takes in my opinion. She then sighs and says. "And Plutarch's plan? You do realise this would put many in danger? Including Blight and your friend Johanna Mason?"

"I know." I hate admitting that actually. "But i'm confident that Plutarch will aim to get as many victors out as possible."

"I suppose." She nods.

I know she can sense my own uncertainty and disliking of that part of the plan. How even though i will accept it for the greater good of things, it still bothers me that it will require throwing someone i care about in the firing line. But i keep telling myself things must play out this way. Besides, i know Johanna will take up the fight if the opportunity is given to her, she's lost too much to Snow to stay out of it. Not to mention if all works well Johanna could be here in Thirteen. It scares me, thinking of what I'd say to her when she realises I'm not dead, but It'd be nice to just see her in person one time before she lets me know she hates me because I'm related to HIM.

Without another word President Coin begins typing on the holographic keyboard that appears on the table before her. Moments later - on the screen in front of us - Plutarch appears, sitting at his desk grinning as always.

"President Coin." He bows his head.

"Alright Plutarch." Coin sits forward and after a deep breath says. "District Thirteen is onboard."


	9. Chapter 9

I'm surprised the mirror doesn't crack as i stand and look at myself in it. The scars on my face make me a terrible sight, unfortunately I wasn't allowed to grow my hair out to at least make them less noticable. I did gow out my beard though, not to the length of some other guys in Thirteen though, so if there is a rule againt it nobody has told me about it. As for the scars on my body, Hansen noted how they bothered me and he offered to cover them up with tattoo's similar to his own. He used to be a stylist back in the Capitol and designed all of his own bodywork, so i agreed. The scars on my arms aren't so noticeable anymore.

When i asked him how he got the resources to do it he simply laughed and said he has his ways of producing the ink himself. So it's entirely possible that what he did as a favour is one hundred percent against the rules. But seeing as its helped me, i won't be complaining. Other then those notable differences to my appearance over the years, the only thing worth mentioning is the dark rings under my eyes. The sleepless nights are finally catching up with me. Worst thing is i don't know how to stop it. It's hardly like i can control my nightmares of killing people and families being murdered and torture.

I look as terrible as i feel right now and with whats coming in the next few days i'd imagine i'm just going to get worse.

After Katniss' victory tour, Plutarch informed us that Snow had agreed on the idea of sending previous victors back into the arena for the Quarter Quell. Snow announced it officially to Panem and today the Reaping's would take place. This whole event is pretty pointless really. Aside from Districts One, Two and Four there really isn't much of choice of victors. Like i said Blight and Johanna already know they're going back, as much as that kills me to say it.

I don't want to, but Coin wants me and Boggs in her office to watch the Reaping's. Looking for other signs of rebellion in the victors that we can exploit, she says. I just want to get this Quarter Quell over with, get Johanna and Katniss and all the victors on our side out safe and then take the fight to the Capitol. Luckily if Plutarch is good on his word the games will be over in a matter of days.

I put on my grey sweatshirt and leave my room, heading straight for President Coin's office where both she and Boggs are waiting. There's the formal greeting off of Coin as always before we sit down and begin watching the Reaping's for the Quell.

The four careers picked were the ones you just wished weren't in the draw at all. Not because you liked them, but because they're the most famous and most powerful. Cashmere and Gloss from District One. Brother and sister, won back to back games and are immensely popular within the Capitol. So much so Snow sells both of them to allies and enemies alike - power for sexual favours by the stars of Panem. Brutus and Enobaria are chosen from District Two. Brutus is the most colossal sized man in Panem and Enobaria is just out right crazy. Going as far as to file her teeth into fangs so she could rip out her opponents throats.

District Three was interesting but not surprising. Beetee Latier, the genius behind all modern Capitol technology, the one who won by killing six tributes with a single wire. Wiress, the crazy, yet by no means stupid women who outsmarted her opponents in her games. District Four was even better. Finnick Odair. That name in itself is really all i need to say, the guy is deadly with a trident and hopefully an ally. His counterpart would have been Annie, but Mags volunteered in place of the hysterical young woman. She's eighty years old.

District Seven was more interesting because of my attachment to them. Blight simply looked on at the crowds as his name was drawn and he lost interest completely after that. Johanna spent the whole time stood on the stage rolling her eyes, smirking, laughing loudly as the new District escort read out all the usual shit and occasionally glancing over to Blight and cursing about the situation they were in. I think i heard "fucking" leave her lips quite a few times. Caesars reaction to it was quite honestly brilliant, he was making noises like a dying dog and stuttering like a fool as he expressed his disgust at the vulgar language she was using.

I wish i was there, being picked with her. I'd make a point of standing with her and swearing to the cameras, telling Snow he can kiss my damn ass. Though Johanna is doing a fine job of that all on her own. The last thing we see before the camera cuts to Eight is Johanna pushing the peacekeepers who tried to grab her away, swearing as she did so.

"I'm not so sure about her, she's too unpredictable." Coin mutters.

I'm on the defensive instantly, even getting riled up about it. "She will. Nobody has more of a reason to hate the Capitol than Johanna."

"It's been four years since you last saw her, she's changed a lot since then." Coin tries it again.

"Look i watched as Snow's henchman pulled the trigger on her own family." It was the only point i had to make to put this to bed. "If she see's a chance to get revenge and get rid of Snow she'll take it and stick it out to the bitter end."

"I agree with the kid." Boggs sits forward in his chair. "Her kind of anger is the type of thing that makes good fighters simply because they have nothing left to lose."

That shuts Coin up and my brain starts telling me to thank Boggs for that later. It annoyed me something terrible that Coin would say that, it's almost like she said it just to see how far I could be pushed. Yes Johanna will be hard to work with, but there's no one else out there who'll remain as loyal to a leader of a rebellion than her. Even if she'll show it in her own weird way.

The Reaping's continue and we all sit in silence. That is until District Twelve. Katniss was obviously going back, yet she remained strong in front of the cameras. Now Haymitch was originally picked to go back, but Peeta volunteered. Honestly it would have worked better for us if he hadn't. At the party in Snows mansion, Haymitch told Plutarch of Katniss' need to protect Peeta. From Snow and the games. If anything were to happen to him then we might lose the chance at winning Katniss over. We can't have that.

Anyway the main thing to mention about Twelves Reaping was when the cameras cut out. Both Peeta and Katniss, hell all of District Twelve, gave the three fingered salute. An action that had been branded as a sign of the rebellion by the Capitol. This act only confirmed it that this is our moment. If they were to know of what we've planned they'd be on board and i know it. They don't care anymore, hence why they so openly show their defiance now. Haymitch vowed not to tell either of them of our intentions, claiming Snow is watching them both and it's too risky for them to know anything.

"Has Plutarch called at all today?" Coin asks Boggs.

Usually she'd have been there to take the call herself, but today she took time out for a personal matter that took her up onto the surface. I'd been shocked when she asked me to go with her instead of Boggs as she mourned her lost husband and daughter. Both had perished when a deadly case of smallpox hit District Thirteen about six years ago. Her husband was the first to contract the virus. According to Coin his death was slow, it took days for it to claim him. Her daughters death was much faster. Coin told me she was fifteen years old at the time and was volunteering in the hospitals to help battle the virus which led to her also contracting it. The outing this morning led me to see another, softer side of Coin, one that i'll likely not see again. It was upsetting to watch, as she asked a higher power why the virus didn't effect her as it did her family. I wasn't supposed to hear that though, so mentioning it, or trying to console the President in anyway, is completely out of the question.

"Yes ma'am." Boggs produces a tablet and hands it to Coin. "He gave these names, said that these were the ones who'd likely unite under the Mockingjay."

Coin sits and looks over the names on the tablet and from what i can see there is quite a lot of them.

"This is over half of the victors." She says a little dumbstruck.

When she see's i'm curious, Coin passes the tablet onto me and allows me to look over the names. The careers were not on there, but all from Four, Seven, Eleven and Six were on board. Even Woof and Cecilia from Eight had been listed.

"Plutarch did say his plan would work." I mutter.

"Seeing that, i'm inclined to believe he is right." She nods.

Of course he's right. This plan is going to work and we'll finally be able to take Snow down. I just get the feeling it's not going to happen without us losing people, both to the games and otherwise.

"Boggs, i want you to get Plutarch on the line we have things to discuss." She turns and faces me. "Ethan, i'm putting you in charge of watching the progress of our newcomers from the Capitol. They claim to be a camera crew and could be useful in future."

I'm assuming she means Cressida and the guys so i get up out of my seat and nod.

"You'll find them waiting in the mess hall for you." She explains.

"Is there anything specific you wish of them?" I ask.

"Teach them to handle themselves." Coin glances to Boggs. "With everything we're about to endure, they'll need to be able to fight."

I too glance at Boggs, who then nods his head and smiles slightly. I know it's a big deal to be put in charge of training them, after all their lives may come down to whatever i show them when we finally cut the tape and declare rebellion.

I nod respectfully to Coin - seeing as it's been drilled into me by now - then leave her office and head for the mess hall. Once there, it's empty aside from myself, Cressida, Pollux, Castor and Messalla. Cressida seems to be discussing something silently with Messalla, whilst Pollux and Castor are playing catch with a serving tray. When they see me both Cressida and Messalla sit up straight and end whatever conversation they were having before i could catch wind of it.

"Everything been okay for you guys?" I ask sitting down at their table.

As always, Cressida is the one to answer. "Not what we're used too, but it's not bad down here."

"Is it the clothes that feel wrong?" I ask with a chuckle, pulling at my grey sweatshirt.

Both laugh, but Messalla says. "They're better. Not every guy likes growing up wearing pink."

"Or girls for that matter." Cressida chuckles.

"Suddenly i'm glad i grew up wearing overalls and flannel shirts." I joke.

Both of them look at me strangely.

"Flannel shirts?" Messalla asks.

Shit, i forgot they were from the Capitol. "It's a thin shirt with checks on it, lumberjacks wear them in District Seven."

They both seem to know what i'm talking about then and the smile at each other before laughing slightly. I laugh with them for some unknown reason, probably so not to feel awkward. When the laughing stops though i bring up the reason i came here.

"So Coin wants you guys to learn how to handle yourselves in a fight." I say. "She put me in charge of it."

"Filming is our strong point. But i see where the self defence comes in." Messalla nods.

Cressida remains silent for a moment before sitting forward slightly and asking. "So Coin is going to give us a frontline role?"

"We won't really know anything until we get started properly, for now our focus is Katniss and getting her out of the arena." I explain. "But it's possible."

I make sure to add that in. I've heard Coin and Boggs talk, they think we'll need more then just Katniss to convince the nation to fight, we'll need propaganda campaigns, recruitment vids and things to hurt the Capitol with. Cressida and the guys are a camera crew, they might be exactly what Coin was hoping for and that's why Plutarch helped them out.

"That's good news." Cressida smiles.

She then stands up, followed by Messalla, and waves over Castor and Pollux. She explains to them that they'll be taking up training and so forth, ending in me being asked the frontline question again, this time by Castor. My answer is the same as before. That dealt with, the four of them sit down with me and arrange a schedule. I remember how Boggs did this with me and i know i should use the same method with these guys. Not only does it allow us to use up time wisely, but it means we could get the training and other stuff out of the way quickly.

Three hours later - with only one session down - i quickly realised that the four of them wouldn't take long to teach. They already knew the basics in self defence, their only downfall was the weapons. Firing, handling and evaluating. Given they lived in the Capitol they won't have handled a gun. Just like i hadn't until i arrived here. But thanks to Boggs, i can show them how to do that and other useful skills that he taught me. My job had been made easier by all of this, but also meant i'd be back to sitting around waiting all day for news from Plutarch in the Capitol. That was only tolerable when he had something to tell us.

Here's to hoping he can convince the Victors to go along with the plan.


	10. Chapter 10

I shoot up in my bed faster then an arrow cuts through air. I'm sweating but i'm freezing. I hate nightmares.

This is the fifth night in a row i've been plagued by them now. I mean they're usually constant, but i at least have one night between every other two where i'm actually able to sleep without waking up panicking. They're always the same. Everything that i've done and thats happened - in the games and since them - it haunts me. I'll see a rotting body on the ground that once belonged to Jackson, it'd talk to me, tell me how it was coming to get me. The body would turn into a vapour and posses Thread, starting the next stage of the nightmare in which i'd see him execute Johanna's family all over again, each time their cries and pleads got more and more desperate. In the final stage, the possessed Thread would spot me and run at me with a speed it was impossible to run from. He'd grin like a maniac before pulling out a whip and beating me with it, putting inhuman strength behind each swing that felt so real. When i die in the nightmare that's when i wake up. Like now. I can't control my breathing for more than ten seconds, which means i can't stop shaking either.

I throw the covers off me and sit upright with my feet touching the floor. Rubbing the back of my neck i sigh as i realise there's still a good two hours before my daily schedule begins. It feels like it's two hours to sit around and think about the dream i had. Thats not good for my sanity in any way. For once, i wish i could have a dream that i didn't want to wake up from. A place where i could be with everybody i left back home. Also a place where we have countless giant statues of Snow and Thread which we burn every day and dance around, just because this is my happy place and that makes me smile.

When i get to thinking i could pass time with my imagination, i delve further into my dream place. I'd live in a nice house with my family and money would just be an unimportant number to us. Reggie wouldn't have been chosen, i wouldn't have had to volunteer in his place. Johanna would live the same way, she'd have her family back, her mom wouldn't have been ill to start with meaning she never would have needed to go to the games, her name would have only been entered six times and she wouldn't have gone.

I tried to think of this world without the games but i don't know any different. It's hard to imagine a life without them around at this point. But nobody i cared about would be chosen for them, and i'd grow the balls to talk to Johanna instead of resorting to staring at her whenever i saw her. That sounds weird when i say it now.

I manage to pass an hour imaging all of that, probably smiling the entire time. Good thing Hansen is out like a light, otherwise i'd appear a huge fool. Instead of sitting around, i spend the last hour showering and getting ready for the day ahead, even if that only takes twenty minuets. The last forty I spend talking with Hansen about the Quell. He isn't allowed to know what we plan, Coin made it clear on who could and couldn't, at least until she announces it to the whole District. But i did tell him to watch for the signs, because they're going to be there.

At exactly nine am, i stroll down to the cafeteria and meet up with my new found friends of sorts. Since i started teaching them to shoot a gun four days ago, i've gotten to know them quite well. The four of them are sat around one table, eating the mush that we call food here. It's porridge for breakfast. Though it's not bad, it could be better. Anyway, Cressida is helping Pollux to eat, seeing as he struggles a lot, whilst Castor and Messalla discuss schedules for the day. When i sit down they all acknowledge me by saying hi, except for Pollux who smiles. Another thing to note, i've learned to communicate with Pollux better thanks to his brother Castor, even if its only simple things for now.

"You look terrible." Cressida comments the miniute i put my tray down.

I sigh, seeing as i know she's right. "I didn't sleep good."

"It's showing." At least she's honest, that's a trait a lot of people around here are lacking.

"Thanks." I chuckle.

She smiles whilst laughing and then turns back to helping Pollux. That's when the Tv's around the cafeteria come on and the Capitol national anthem is playing. Time for an update on the games.

I know the gamemaker scoring was last night but Coin, myself and Boggs were in a debriefing with Plutarch at the time it was aired. I could have asked, but then remembered that it would be recapped the day after. Now. The footage playing in the background is of the tribute parade three days ago whilst Caesar and Claudius Templesmith recap that moment when the costumes of Katniss and Peeta burned like coal. It was amazing, i'll admit it. Then they play yesterdays addition of the scores being announced. The careers and Finnick scored tens and over, as was expected. Blight scores a five and Johanna a eight, a big difference from the three she scored originally four years ago. Twelve was an interesting one, both of them breaking Hunger Games records yet again by scoring twelves, though that i did know about yesterday, it's what Plutarch was updating us on.

Peeta painted Rue's grave that Katniss had made in the games last year on the floor. Katniss made a hanging effigy for Seneca Crane, the head gamemaker who Snow forced into suicide after he allowed the lethal lovers to walk out of the arena last year. I found the whole situation hilarious to be quite honest.

Tonight it would be the interviews with Caesar Flickerman and tomorrow the games would begin and we'd see if Plutarch's arena design will help our plan along as much as he claims it will.

"Ethan!"

I turn around and see Boggs marching over with haste. He stops close enough so i can here him without having to shout and says. "President Coin is expecting us."

"Sure." I get up instantly, noting how the eyes of Cressida and the others are on me as i do. "I'll see you guys later." I say to them.

They all nod and go about their business as i follow Boggs out of the cafeteria and to President Coin's office. When we get there Coin is on vid call with Plutarch, though this time there is somebody with him. Haymitch Abernathy.

Upon noticing that Boggs and i had arrived, Coin stands up from her chair and asks. "So what do you have for me?"

"Names and a plan." Plutarch answers.

"Then share them." She says.

"Mr Abernathy managed to secure solid alliances for Katniss across three separate districts." Plutarch gestures to Haymitch who stands forward. "If you would please..."

"Sure, sure." He waves Plutarch off. "Finnick Odair has agreed that he and Mags will stay with them and get them to safety away from the careers. I spoke with Johanna Mason and she agreed to the terms - reluctantly but eventually - that she would protect Wiress and Beete and get them to Katniss."

I feel an all too satisfied smirk on my face when Haymitch says Johanna agreed to be part of this. Coin even glanced at me as though she knew i would be at that precise moment.

"Other victors on our side include both tributes from Districts Six and Eleven." Plutarch finishes. "I believe Woof and Cecilia also agreed to look out for Katniss but it's not definite."

Haymitch nods in confirmation.

"And the arena?" Coin asks. "With such challenging surroundings how do you intend on getting them out?"

"Beetee Latier has planned everything out, though it will include destroy the arena." Plutarch straightens out his jacket and laughs a little. "The plan is to wait until all those not with us are dead before Beetee uses the lightning tree to destroy the arena. Ms Mason has been instructed to take care of the tracker in Everdeens arm at any cost. The others we'll deal with once we have them on board a hovercraft and Thirteen bound."

"Why wait for the others to die?" Boggs folds his arms.

"There are preparations we must make, the games will be a distraction for Snow, it allows us to do so a bit more freely. Plus people need to see that our girl is a survivor in the worst of situations." Plutarch also folds his arms and then stares at me. "I may need your help once we arive in Thirteen, Ethan."

"My help?" I ask a little dumbfounded.

Plutarch only nods and smiles.

It's Haymitch who steps closer to the camera, points and says. "Hey, aren't you that boy from Seven? The one who died a few years back?"

Well that's putting it bluntly. Regardless i nod.

He continues pointing "Well when you see Johanna again, tell her stripping naked in front of a drunk old man like myself isn't what she wants to be doing with her life."

"She what?" I ask.

I can see Coin rolling her eyes right now. Haymitch saying that is clearly making her think her statement of Johanna being too unpredictable was the most valid point since stating Snow was an evil, vindictive bastard.

Haymitch nods. "Right in front of myself, our little heroine - who didn't enjoy it so much - and Peeta - who enjoyed it more than he lets on."

I start laughing quietly to myself suddenly, gaining a smirk off Haymitch and a grin off Boggs but a scowl of President Coin.

Johanna did say to me she wanted to strip in front of somebody one day. By the sounds of it she got mixed reactions. Haymitch loved it, Katniss hated it and Peeta likely loved every second of it but it won't admit because of his finance disliking it.

"With all due respect Mr Abernathy, that is not the reason we're holding this meeting." Plutarch states it plainly.

Haymitch throws his hands out and says. "What? I thought the kid deserved to know his lady friend is running around naked showing off her lovely bosom."

I should probably watch my behavior whilst in a formal meeting as Coin would call it, but all i can do is laugh. Maybe it's because Haymitch is one hundred percent drunk as a skunk right now and everybody knows it.

"Enough of this childishness!" Coin slams her fist on the table.

The smile on my face vanishes and i shut up.

Haymitch grins at Coin and says. "Sorry darlin'."

She sighs tiredly. "Plutarch you and I will talk later, without Mr Abernathy present."

"Of course, Ma'am." Plutarch bows his head.

"Pleasure meeting you, Madam President." Haymitch smiles

"Just get your job done." She says to him coldly before disconnecting.

I was right to expect a bollocking off Coin for being so childish, because she certainly didn't hold back when she started on me. Though she said she understood eventually, she also said its my job to stay professional when in situations like that. At the end of the day i'm still that kid from District Seven, not an army born civilian and sometimes it's impossible not to laugh. Especially when i know she'll have enjoyed every second she was in front of them.

Coin practically throws me out of her office after that, ordering me to follow my schedule until she needs me again.

The rest of the morning i'm working away along side Castor in the armoury smiling and laughing randomly every time i think of what Haymitch said to me. I think i'm just happy to know Johanna is finding ways to amuse herself at the expense of others. When we hit the training centre and meet up with Pollux and Cressida, they all watch me strangely as i start grinning to myself when the thoughts pop back up again. It stays that way the entire session, yet strangely none of them ask why. At lunch time though, Cressida does sit forward and ask me why i've been grinning to myself all day. I told her why, I mean i doubt it's vital information to the rebellion, unless Coin plans on seducing Snow by throwing naked women at him. You never know, it could work.

Cressida made comments on how she always thought Johanna was a loose cannon ready to fire at any given time, but not in a bad way. She actually said it was refreshing to see a victor who was a little on the side of rebellious than them falling at Snows feet and being puppets for him to play with.

After lunch i was relieved from any actual duties so decided to go help Pollux with his work in Storage. Basically just lifting heavy crates of weapons and the odd nuclear warhead, because here in Thirteen there is a whole damn lot of them. Makes you feel uneasy, knowing if just one goes off you're screwed. It'd be quick though, I guess.

I helped out there until five, at which point we all returned to our rooms. I stayed there for an hour, before heading back out to the empty cafeteria in order to watch the Quell interviews. When i say empty, i mean it. Not even the cooks are here cooking up the slushy shit they call good grub. Most people have likely gathered in the meeting hall, a place in which the games will be broadcast over the projector. I would go there to watch, but there's that many people there you can't hear what's going on on screen. So Coin agreed to air the interviews in the cafeteria for me when we went topside a while back.

I sit down just as the show comes on the tv, the music playing and showing various images of Caesar smiling and laughing and even crying when interviewing certain Victors after they won. Showing the three acts of drama the Capitol love, happiness, humour and sadness that isn't there's. After the starting screen the cameras switch to the indoor stage set for the interviews this year. Being a Quell it was a huge improvement over last year. Along the back with the screens was an entire stand made for the victors. The stage was made with silver trims and black marble and was much much bigger compared to any stage ever for the tributes. Nice of the Capitol to give them that, right?

Caesar walks out of the automated doors underneath the stand for the victors, again showing the improvement of things for the Quell. He has purple hair this year, purple everything actually. He starts laughing and waving to the crowd, "Thank you! Thank You! Thank you for being here tonight, on the eve of the seventy fifth annual Hunger Games!"

The cameras pan onto the massive audience and show them going wild in their seats. Their crying, laughing and clapping with excitement at the same time. Some are grabbing each other and screaming into each others faces. Tch, I thought they were bad last year.

"We have never seen anything like this. And we will never see anything like it again." Caesar hushes the crowds with his words. "Because tonight, on this stage, twenty four of Panem's brightest stars, will vie for the ultimate crown. Tonight will be their final opportunity to express their thoughts. Our final opportunity to express our love. And heartbreakingly, to say goodbye to all but one."

The audience let out heartbroken sighs as Caesar says that. Obviously thats not how it's going to be, we're going to get as many of them out as possible, save for the careers. We could have approached them for the rebellion I suppose but their districts are too close to the Capitol. It's not really worth the risk. Besides, this has to look like an actual Hunger Games for a while, that means somebody has to die. Unfortunately they drew the short straws.

"Let's hear it." Caesar shouts and starts laughing, inciting the crowd to do the same. "I'm so excited!"

There is a quick break so the Capitol could air a very special message from Snow about the Quell. He detailed how very sad he is to lose twenty three stars of the Capitol, but i can see it in his eyes, the bastard is glad. He's getting rid of twenty three threats to his life in his opinion. When the interviews are back on, Caesar welcomes siblings Cashmere and Gloss onto the stage. I lose interest when Cashmere starts pretend crying, it always has annoyed me when you could see it was fake.

I use the opportunity to stretch and rub my eyes, seeing as the game plan the brother and sister are playing is just irritating me. The interviews for the other half of the careers are much more interesting. Brutus is a man of few words and that made him terrifying, and who doesn't love a bit of crazy Enobaria remarking how upset she is with all this Quell stuff but still she plans on enjoying it. Beete Latier made some interesting points on how the Quell was written by men and it can surely be unwritten just as easily. Wiress was short with her answers and little bit barmy, but she and Beete are genius' and will benefit us greatly in the rebellion assuming we can get them out.

"Finnick." Caesar introduces the man of great interest to me.

I've been informed enough of how Finnick at times seems to be the only other person Johanna gets along with aside from Blight. When i meet him, i'm going to make sure i thank him for being there for her.

"I believe you have a message for a very special somebody." Caesar laughs and Finnick grins to the crowd. "Can we hear it?"

Finnick nods and looks at the camera longingly. "My love. You have my heart, for all eternity. And if ... If i die in that arena, my last thought will be of your lips."

Up until now, the victors had used their interview to voice their displeasure with the whole Quarter Quell, yet Finnick keeps up his charming, darling act. I think I know why though, I mean he never specified who he was speaking too and that'll drive all the women in the Capitol insane thinking it's them. Making lots of people think they could be your one true love is a hell of way of starting some fights. My hat is off to Finnick.

The next victor from district four was Mags, it was upsetting to watch in truth. She was too old for this, she didn't deserve to spend her twilight in an arena when she could be living much longer peacefully at home.

Five and Six go up and get interviewed and go stand with the others, then the one district i'm watching for rolls up. Mine.

As Johanna walks onto the stage, dressed in a light brown dress resembling tree bark, i can almost feel the anger radiating from her and i'm watching on a screen. Caesar must be shitting himself.

After he laughs and stops the crowd chanting her name happily he says. "Now we have seen a lot of tears here tonight. But i see no tears in Johanna's eyes, Johanna you are angry."

I think that's putting it lightly. She looks like she's ready to go Enobaria on everyone and start ripping throats out. With blunt teeth that makes her even crazier.

It's even more evident when she does that agitated laugh she uses so often. "Well yes i'm angry." She does the laugh again and looks Caesar dead in the eye. "The deal was that if i win the hunger games, i get to live the rest of my life in peace." Her eyes move from Caesar and land directly on the camera. It's as though she is looking directly at Snow as she says. "But now you want to kill me again."

This time when she laughs you can just here the hate and anger bundled up within her.

Johanna rolls her eyes onto the crowd still laughing and shouts. "Well you know what? *Bleep* that! And *bleep* everybody that had anything to do with it!"

Even i'm sat with my mouth hung in a perfect 'O' as Johanna storms off the stage still swearing and being censored and insulting every Capitol member she possible can before she exits at the side. Even if the Capitol bleeped out the word, it's very obvious she just told the Capitol, Snow and near enough everybody to fuck off. If that doesn't show a rebel i'll quite gladly cut off my left testicle. Snow's face right now will be priceless.

So far Johanna is the only victor to actually be honest and say what she really feels about well, everything. She didn't hide behind the innocent little Mason act like she could have. She just showed her true anger and left them all catching flies and disgusted with her foul language. In some ways i think her carefree attitude is a good thing, it means nobody will mess her around. In other ways it's going to make her reckless to a point where i doubt she'll care if she lives or dies. Hell she might already be thinking that way, it wouldn't surprise me.

But i'm already worried about her enough as it is, i don't need to add more of a reason to be.

Caesar is pretty quick to move on from Johanna who can still be heard faintly, shouting at people backstage. It's after Blight has walked on stage that she finally stops and the crowd stop gasping in shock at her behaviour.

"Blight, it's been a long time since you have stepped out onto a stage with an audience as large as this." Caesar smiles and puts a hand on Blights shoulder. "How do you see your odds of winning?"

Blight doesn't look at Caesar, the audience or the camera, he just looks at his shoes as he says. "I'm not here to win. I'm h-here to survive as long as i can." Then he looks at them and says. "This w-whole Quell feels like a betrayal. Have we not paid o-our dues the first time we played these games?"

The effect he has is quite surprising, seeing as by most standards he wasn't an incredibly popular victor. He has many of the Capitol citizens in the audience nodding in agreement with him and wiping away tears with small hankies.

"I can see you're very upset by this." Caesar nods and develops an empathetic look on his face. "And i think all of us, are deeply saddened. But we wish you the best of luck, Blight."

"Thank you." Blight nods.

"Ladies and gentlemen, please give a big hand for Blight!" Caesar holds Blights hand in the air.

The crowd do as Caesar asks and each and everyone of them are convinced they will never see Blight again. In fact, up until District Twelve they harbour the same looks on their faces, at that point they're so damn excited for whose about to come out their smiles are almost jumping off their faces.

"Ladies and gentleman, the victor of last years Hunger Games!" Caesar motions to the doors with a swing of his arm as he shouts. "Katniss Everdeen!"

Out she walks. Our Mockingjay. Dressed in a long, incredibly large and not so pretty wedding dress made of feathers. I'm pretty sure this dress was not her stylists choice, it was too tacky for his tastes. Cinna i think, he makes dresses to suit who she is and this wedding dress didn't do that. Regardless Katniss comes out onto the stage with the crowds flailing just for the chance to say her name and stands beside Caesar who looks her dress over multiple times.

"Katniss Everdeen! You look stunning! Doesnt she?" He gestures back and forth between the gown and the crowd.

It's breathtaking just how crazy their all going over her. They're grabbing each other and screaming and cheering. It's not going to be a secret that she is the favourite.

"Now Katniss this is a very big and very emotional night for all of us. Won't you say?" Caesar holds the mic out to Katniss.

The girl on fire smiles sweetly and chuckles. "Don't go crying on me now Caesar."

Caesar starts laughing and getting excited. "I can't make any promises you know me."

"Well you know i wouldn't believe you even if you did." She counters.

They love that, all of them, seeing as their laughing and screaming more until Caesar hushes them down again.

"But Katniss, on a more serious note. I think we're all here a little disappointed that a certain wedding will not take place. Aren't we folks?" He looks at the audience sombrely then back to Katniss. "Alas... But am i correct in saying that this is the gown you would of worn on that day. Yes? No?"

Katniss smiles, though something in her falters "Yes president Snow thought everyone would want to see it."

Of course it was Snow who told her to wear the dress.

"Well president Snow, as usual, is right." Caesar smirks to the crowd and shouts. "Am i right folks? I love it! I love it! Don't you love it?!" He looks back at Katniss and says, "Will you do us the honour please."

Everybody knows what he means. The infamous spin by the girl on fire. But how could she top the flames on her dress from last year? Well you could always turn the ugly wedding dress into a beautiful blue gown styled like a Mockingjay bird with wings that opened out when Katniss outstretched her arms. That's exactly what she did. It was amazing, the audience were going wild and Caesar was stammering like a fool as he looked on in true awe.

He started stammering about what the dress was so much Katniss had to say it for him. "A Mockingjay."

To that he nodded excitedly and said. "Your stylist has certainly outdone himself this time, Cinna, stand up and take a bow!"

The cameras travel into the audience in time to pick up the man behind the dress that spelt out freedom. You could see it in his face that he was proud of what he'd done, but he knew the odds of getting away with this were slim. I see now that not everybody Capitol is the same, that some of them don't have dark personalities to hide. Cressida and the others are great people and if i hadn't ever been told they were from the Capitol i never would have guessed it. For what he just did and the way he and Katniss share a glance to one another, i'm willing to bet Cinna is just the same.

Katniss is told to go up and stand with the other victors, she's right at the end near Chaff from eleven as Caesar introduces Peeta Mellark. The reception he receives is almost as big as Katniss', but still not quite there.

"Peeta." Caesar nods at Peeta. "The wedding. Marriage. Never to be."

"Well actually we got married, in secret." The audience gasp in disbelief.

"A secret wedding?" Caesar chuckles. "Alright do tell."

"We want our love to be eternal." The audience coo at that. "You know Katniss and I, we've been luckier the most and we wouldn't have any regrets at all if not... If not..."

Caesar's face becomes both curious and worried. "If not for what? What is it?"

Peeta breaths in deeply and says. "If it weren't for the baby."

The second the word baby left his lips the entire crowd was off their seats shouting at Caesar and the cameras to stop the games and how it was inhumane to do this. Are they really only just realising the games are inhumane now? As for the pregnancy i'm not even sure if it's real or not, Plutarch has said nothing and i'm sure Haymitch would have told him if it was true. Either way it got the reaction that the rebels needed and that's really all that matters until we get through the games and get them out.

With the crowd still in uproar, Caesar sends Peeta to stand with Katniss and the victors as he tries to calm them by saying how surprised they all are. The audience only grow more restless with what happened next. Katniss, Peeta, Finnick, Johanna and Blight were the first victors to instigate the act, but the others - including the careers - soon followed.

Each and every victor held each others hands in the air.


	11. Chapter 11

The head of the metal target near enough explodes as the bullets from the assault rifle make contact with it. Cressida is stood smirking victoriously as looks at me sideways and puts down the gun.

"Nice shot." I comment chuckling.

"You aren't as bad a teacher as you think you are." She smiles.

"It is nice to know i'm not wasting my breath."

She laughs as we start walking away from the shooting range. "I'm assuming you watched the Quell interviews elsewhere last night?"

I nod. "Yeah."

"I told Castor there's no way you'd miss them." She gestures to Castor who is helping Pollux reassemble his rifle. "What a way to shove it Snow right?"

"Yeah, though i think they hoped it would stop the games." I run my hand through my hair as we reach the reloading bench.

"Snow would never allow that." Cressida takes one of the screwdrivers from the tool box.

Snow wouldn't but neither would Plutarch, using the games is the only way we're getting any of the victors to the district without the Capitol tracking and following us. I get to work on tweaking the sights of the weapons that have been left by the recruits, Cressida doing the same. There's a moment of silence between us before Cressida stops what she's doing and looks up at me.

"So Johanna's interview was, interesting to say the least." She says.

I look up briefly from what i'm doing and nod. For the past few days Cressida has been saying things like that, hinting at something she was curious about. I'll be honest though, this is the first time she's mentioned Johanna.

"I'm unable to decide if she's incredibly gutsy or crazy." Cressida giggles.

I think at this moment in time it's a bit of both. Johanna was always gutsy and anger is a hell of a fuel to drive you crazy.

"I'd say a bit of both." I shrug. "I just hope she watches what she's doing in the arena."

Speaking of the arena, she's in there right now, they all are. They went in about three hours ago but Coin wouldn't let me watch because i had work to do apparently. Boggs had the thought to tell me that both Johanna and Blight got away from the cornucopia unharmed though, so i'm not completely in the dark on things.

A gentle smile appears on Cressida's face as she says. "You really care about her, don't you?"

I smile nervously. "I didn't think it was that obvious."

"Please, I'm not stupid." She laughs. "Four years is a long time to wait for someone who thinks you're dead."

I've never thought of it as waiting for her. She was never truly a girlfriend anyway. I mean i've been occupied with other stuff since escaping the Capitol and trying to save my life and earn my place here kind of took over. Through it all i've known i cared about Johanna and i still do, it just never felt like i was waiting for her. I wouldn't be surprised in any way to hear that she's found someone. I'd be sort of hurt, i think, at the same time as happy for her.

Cressida still continues talking about a topic i'd rather keep to myself, but yet i don't stop her or even come close to trying too.

"You know, i watched you guys in the arena during the seventy first games." She puts down what she's holding. "We all did. And the only other time we've seen something like with you and her, was with Katniss and Peeta last year. Difference is nobody dares bring you up in a conversation with Johanna, it's different with Twelve."

I actually laugh a little as i say. "Plus i think they got a slightly better ending."

She only nods to agree with me before moving on and saying. "But imagine if things had played out differently. It could be you and her that they're asking to front a rebellion."

Imagine that. Johanna the Mockingjay that everybody worships. I'd imagine she'd do it just to make Snow history and Panem a better place. She'd get annoyed by the people worshipping her though. I don't think it's any secret that she isn't a people person to start with. On the serious side of that though, imagine how different everything would be now. Maybe i wouldn't be in District Thirteen, maybe i'd be at home or in the Quell like Johanna is right at this moment in time. Who knows, but i can't help but to think that the first two years after winning would have been better for both us.

"I doubt we'd be half as inspiring." I comment distracting myself with working again.

"You don't know that." Cressida does the same and starts working again. "A lot of people were upset when you "died", more so when she tried to help you."

Yeah i bet all of them thought about it in a way that made me and Johanna public love birds like Everdeen and Mellark. I bet it upset them, knowing they were missing out on juicy gossip if one of us died and the other lived. I can already imagine the questions they'd be asking. Are you getting married? Are their any little ones due? What's your favourite position? Everything, they'd want to know it all so they could try and be like you. I'm overreacting, but knowing how nosy most of them are in the Capitol i'm probably closer to the truth then you'd think.

Cressida picks up on the fact i'm not rightfully enjoying this conversation and so she just goes silent and keeps working that way. I'm thankful really, this way i won't ramble myself into an early grave. By the time i've finished up working for the day it has to be late in the evening. I'm tired and i want to sleep, but i want to watch the games even more just to make sure everything is alright.

Working out a deal with Coin the other day meant i could watch the games in my room using a projector built into a small cube. It meant i had to work extra around the district, but it's not that big a price to pay. Not when i can follow whichever tributes i want this way. I actually switch between Katniss and Johanna. It feels like i should follow both of their progress' seeing as the idea is for them to meet up eventually. At the minuet nothing much is happening with Katniss, everybody is sleeping, including her. Johanna and Blight are both awake on the other side of the jungle, they aren't talking and instead are merely just looking around. Johanna repeatedly digging her axe into the ground and wiping the sweat away from her forehead. They look thirsty and with the arena being a jungle i can imagine it's humid and awful to be in. When the cameras pan out i can't see any other source of water save for that surrounding the Cornucopia and that's likely salt water so it's no good. The look on Blights face right now says a lot to me. He's almost sure this is how he's going to die, through dehydration. He won't. Johanna will think of something surely, and if not her then Wiress or Beetee who are also with them will. They are genius' after all.

I watch even more closely as Johanna stands up from her spot on the ground and stretches.

"Come on we should keep moving." She says.

Blight, Beete and Wiress all look up at Johanna from their positions on the ground exhausted.

She lets out an impatient tut as she says. "We need to find Finnick and the love birds. We're not doing it sat around on our asses." She gives all of them but Blight a death glare. "Now get up."

They all listen to her and pick themselves up off the ground, despite the fact she's the youngest there. In fact, she's the youngest person in the arena aside from Peeta and Katniss. Still, she is one of the most skilled fighters and to Blight, Beete and Wiress is their main weapon against the careers should they attack.

Blight follows Johanna closely whilst Beete and Wiress keep their distance. All four of them are constantly looking up to the sky as they walk. It takes me a while to realise why, but when i see the dark clouds looming overhead i know. Rain clouds. They're all the so thirsty those clouds must appear as a brilliant source, like a glass of ice cold water on a hot summers day.

The clouds eventually get to a point where they look to burst. The four of them stop and wait for the rain to fall down on them and clench their thirst. It does just that, only the rain is thick, and red. Blood. The rain was blood. It took them seconds to realise, in fact it hadn't even hit them before they knew. But once it began falling they were trapped in it. I couldn't even see clearly through it, and i'm not there, i'm watching through a screen.

They start running blindly through it, trying to find a way out from what I can hear - because I can't see a thing. Wiress is screaming about the blood, saying its that of the fallen as she runs. Beete is surely grabbing onto his District counterpart and keeping her moving with them. I lose sight of whats happening for a long while, almost an hour in fact. I can hear what's going, but all i can see is the cameras being streaked with blood. It's during this time that i hear the loud zap of electrical buzzing, like somebody disrupting a field of energy. Shouting follows the buzzing, it sounds like Johanna but the sound of the rain distorts it.

Then it stops just as fast as it came. The rain clears, the cameras clean themselves and reveal to me a sight i wished i wouldn't see at all.

Blight was laid on the floor, covered in blood from the rain, but his head it was ... burnt? You could barely see it was him. Johanna was knelt beside him, screaming his name as she tried to bring him round. She too was covered head to toe in blood that wasn't her own, as were Beete and Wiress. In front of them the force field was re-materialising, as though something had made contact with ... Blight, he'd hit the force field, that's why his face is unrecognisable and why he isn't moving.

Johanna is still trying to resuscitate him, despite the fact the cannon fired about a miniute ago. Blight was gone. She knew it but still she tried on for another couple of minuets before giving up. No tears fall, but i know Blights death has hit her incredibly hard. She's known him longer than me, and still i can feel myself getting more and more upset the more i look at his lifeless body. Johanna slowly gets up onto her feet, her eyes don't leave Blights body until Beetee makes his way over to stand beside her, at which point she locks them onto him.

"I'm sorry." He says genuinely.

Johanna says nothing, she just looks back at Blights body, then to Beete once more and scowls. "Move." She says as she barges past him and starts walking away.

Beete and Wiress are quick to follow her, but don't speak at all.

I find myself capable of watching no more, all i can see is Blights face. Burnt and peeling away. His eyes lifeless and cold that were still wide open as he died. I shut off the cube instantly and stand up to head into the bathroom. I splash freezing water over my face until i forget what i saw, at least a little.

I can't believe he's gone. I didn't know him long but i still cared. Now he's gone and i hate knowing it's because of our stupid fucking plan. If we hadn't agreed to do this then he'd still be alive wouldn't he? I pick up one of the metal holding jars on the side of the sink and throw it at the wall behind me.

Unable to stop thinking along those lines i storm out of my room and start wondering around. I needed to clear my head and cooping myself up in that room would just drive me crazy.


	12. Chapter 12

I sit up in my bed sweating and panting. Awoken from sleep by the very same nightmares that have plagued me for so damn long. I don't know how much longer i can take them before i crack. I don't bother dressing properly before leaving my room to head to the mess hall. When i get there i stand over the food with my tray in hand, but none of it seems appealing to me. In fact i feel sick, and the food slushed up in the serving bowls is what i'd imagine my vomit would look like. I go to join Cressida and the guys at their table with only a glass of water, not daring to risk bringing anything i eat back up.

"Are you okay Ethan?" Messalla asks as i sit down beside him.

I nod, no words are spoken though. I can feel it, that they know whats bothering me. It's the way they're looking at each other, looks of concern and pity.

"We're sorry about Blight." Says Castor, confirming what i already know.

After he's said that images of Blights final moments flash in my mind. His face and his eyes and Johanna sitting over his bloody body.

"Me too." I say quietly and drink the water from my cup.

They all fall silent and just glance around at each other. It makes me feel awkward to say the least, as though i've brought on this sudden depressed mood. Truth is i probably have, i've had a face like a smacked ass all morning. To try and get them talking, i flick my head in the direction of the tv screens on the wall which are showing footage of the careers in the arena.

"Anything else happened?" I ask.

Cressida nods her head and the air around all of us seem to lighten, "Mags died during the early hours of the morning, just after Blight."

"Mags? How?" I near enough sprint out of my seat hearing that, i don't know why.

"There was a fog of some kind chasing their group. Poison." Says Messalla.

"Mags gave her own life so Finnick could save Peeta." Castor finishes.

"And Katniss?" She is the main one we're all watching for, it only felt right to ask.

"She's fine. They all are." Cressida answers and smiles gently.

That's good to know. The three of them are strong allies to have and we need all three of them alive for this rebellion. But i'm not completely heartless as to think of that as the only reason it's good they're alive. That's more Coin's way of thinking.

"Was there anything else?" I drink the water once more.

"The female from Six." Messalla says as he shoves a spoon full of porridge into his mouth. "She sacrificed herself to save Peeta from mutts."

"Johanna managed to get Beete and Wiress to Katniss safely." Cressida looks at me knowingly and then points to the biggest screen in the mess hall.

On it showed all of them together. Finnick and Peeta were on the beach, the two of them sitting down and chatting whilst Beete was off to the side pulling and tugging away at a thick wire wrapped around a metal cylinder. Katniss, Wiress and Johanna were in the water. Katniss was cleaning the blood off of Wiress who seemed to be out of it a little more than usual. Johanna had cleaned the blood off her body and now seemed more interested in cleaning the axes she wielded then conversing with the others.

It's kind of comical to watch as Katniss splashes cold water over Wiress, causing the older woman to randomly start shouting "Tick Tock" over and over. Johanna's reaction to it actually forced half the people in the mess hall to start laughing. She sighed, used her hand to wave off the other women in the group and as she was walking away told Katniss to "have fun with Nuts", meaning Wiress. It's a relief to see she still has that knack for nicknaming people, it means that she hasn't been changed completely by what she's been through.

I must have been smiling as i watched that, because the looks on Cressida and Castor's faces... It was like your close friends getting all giddy when they catch you staring at a girl you like. Or better yet, it was like Reggie when he'd catch me staring at Johanna during my time in school. In fact it's exactly like Reggie's reaction.

I wonder how he's doing. Reg i mean, it's been a long time now since i last heard of him. When i did it was when Powell told me he was at my funeral. How many years ago was that? Four? Five?

I digress.

During my trip down memory lane, Katniss managed to figure out the secret that Plutarch had intentionally set to help our efforts in rescuing the victors from the arena. With the help of Wiress' crazy rambling, she discovered the arena was set out like an hour clock. Each hour sports a different danger. That's what the blood rain was last night, and the fog this morning. That only accounted for three of the hours, five when Katniss begins telling Beetee of mutts and some giant wave that came from one of the sectors. The large tree at the far end of the arena is also noted more than once.

It seemed that the six of them had a moment to breath now and the Cornucopia was all theirs. Noticing that, they head there and begin restocking on supplies. Katniss retrieves a fresh quiver of arrows and Peeta a new sword, one that's in better condition than his current one. Beete stands and inspects the tree off in the distance, something about it clearly peaking the interest of his genius mind. As for Finnick and Johanna, they gathered around Peeta as he began drawing sketches of the arena in the dirt at the mouth of the Cornucopia. They all follow eventually, aside from Wiress who stays down by the water, singing an old nursery rhyme involving clocks - of all things.

In his drawing, Peeta numbers the wedges of the clock and lists the danger found in them. When asked about what she saw when the current group was separated, Johanna said all they could see was blood and nothing else. Because of that, they all agreed on staying away from the active sectors as a measure of safety. Then the peace around them is disrupted by a gasp, sounds of choking on blood and a cannon fired into the air as Wiress' body falls limp in the arms of Gloss.

They react as fast as possible, Katniss drawing her arrow before the others can even move and firing it straight into the chest of Gloss. Another cannon fires, confirming his death. But in the moments it took for Katniss to end Gloss, his sister Cashmere had begun charging at her from the left side of the Cornucopia. Luckily for Katniss, Johanna was standing right beside her and noticed Cashmere running up with blind rage and drawing her knife. Johanna physically flung Katniss to the ground out of the way and then manoeuvred into a backspin, throwing the axe in her hand pummelling towards Cashmere at lethal speeds. The strength behind it was evident as when the axe imbedded itself in Cashmere's chest, it forced her off her feet into the air, killing her instantly in turn.

During that time, the final two careers - Brutus and Enobaria - made an attempt to attack Finnick and Peeta. Enobaria was first to flee when she noticed Johanna and Katniss were now heading for them. Brutus soon followed but not before tearing a hole through the fabric of Finnick's swimsuit, damaging his arm. Katniss and Johanna chase after them, leaving Finnick and Peeta behind to check on Beetee.

Both careers are off the island when it jerks out of place, knocking the others off their feet violently as it began spinning in circles, forcing the water surrounding it to rise into the air like a wall. On one side of the island, Finnick and Peeta are fighting with all their strength to hold on to the surface, so not to go flying back into the wall of water with a force strong enough to kill them. Beete looses his grip at some point and begins rolling down towards the water, lucky for him Finnick is able to grab him and hold him in place.

On the other side, Johanna is managing to hold on to the rocks on the ground and stop herself from slipping down, but Katniss is loosing her grip and the fear flashes on her face when her hands finally slip off. Johanna instantly launches herself towards Katniss and grabs her hand to prevent her from falling, only problem was now they were both slipping. Realising she couldn't support them both on her own, Johanna digs her remaining axe into the ground to hold herself still and grips onto Katniss' hand tighter. By this point it's clear that Johanna is struggling against the forces pulling at both her arms as Katniss continues to be pulled down the island by the force of the water, but regardless she continues to fight whatever pain she feels in order to keep Katniss from slipping away. Eventually though, Katniss' hand begins slipping out of Johanna's and she is unable to regather the grip she previously had. Katniss is jerked back violently into the water and goes under.

Everybody in the mess hall had fallen silent as we watch the spinning cornucopia finally slow down and Katniss doesn't resurface. They all thought that was it. The Mockingjay was gone as were their chances of rebellion. But i know better, i know there is no way Plutarch would endanger Katniss' life.

I'm proven right as the cameras find the girl on fire pulling herself up onto one of the stone walkways leading to the cornucopia island. Surprisingly Johanna is the first one to recover from the dizziness and runs over to help Katniss out of the water, though Peeta isn't far behind her. She pats Katniss' back to help her get the water in her lungs up before stepping aside and allowing Peeta to see to his wife.

"Let's just get what we need and get off the bloody island." Johanna comments as she catches her breath and starts heading towards Finnick who stood on the island with Beetee.

They do just that, after Katniss has regained all of her bearings and is able to stand on her own without the aid of Peeta.

The gamemakers must think they all have some downtime, as the cameras switch to Brutus and Enobaria who are still running through the jungle. Everybody after that is looking at the screen, but not one of them is really paying attention, they're all too busy discussing how they just very nearly lost the one hope we had in this world. Even Cressida, Castor and Messalla can't believe it. I'll be honest it was a close one, and i'll safely say that if Johanna hadn't been where she was after Katniss shot Gloss, then our Mockingjay may have fallen to Cashmere there and then. And who knows what would have happened if she hadn't caught Katniss when she did. From the distance she was from the water at first, falling down from there probably would have killed her, the force from the water hitting her would have shattered her neck.

I sure hope that Coin was watching in her office. I'm sure she'll see now that Johanna is one who will risk everything to save Katniss and she can stop using it to piss me off.

After breakfast i follow Messalla to the training rooms for the morning where i remain until mid afternoon. After that we go to go back to the mess for lunch but i'm pulled up halfway by Boggs who tells me to head to Coin's office at the earliest convenience. So i part ways with Messalla and alter my course.

Coin's voice is not the only one i can here as i reach her office. I half expected to walk in and see her talking with Plutarch over vid call, but no. In the room with her was a man i'd never met before. His hair auburn in colour, curled tightly on top of his head. He dressed in fancy thirteen overalls much like Coin's outfit, only he wore an array of pins along the collar. Their conversation falls dead when this man see's me and the moment his eyes look me up and down i know i don't like him. You can see just by the way he holds himself, he thinks he's superior to everybody else.

"Ah, this must be Snow's grandson." He says looking between me and Coin. His eyes then narrow as he says. "We should have shot you the moment you arrived."

"I beg pardon, Becket." Coin glares the man - Becket - down. "Ethan is not considered a relative of Snow here. He has been incredibly useful and committed to improving the state of this district and all of Panem since the day he arrived."

"He's still related to that monster of a man regardless." He looks at me, his dull blue eyes somehow narrowing further. "You don't deserve the air you breath boy."

There's a brief moment of silence where i just stand with my arms behind my back smirking at this moron. Eventually i say, "I'm sorry i didn't die for you and make your life easier."

He goes to speak, but Coin beats him to it. "Enough!"

Becket soon shuts his face after the President uses that tone. He seems to know his place, despite appearing to be a total snooty asswipe.

"Becket you can tell the board that i appreciate their concerns. But i am in charge here and i know what i am doing." Coin says much calmer. "Now leave us."

"Of course, Madam President." Becket bows his head respectfully before honouring Coin's command and leaving the office as fast as he could.

"Boggs said that i was too report here." I say after she has sat down in her chair.

She nods to confirm it. "Plutarch has informed me that they're ready pull out the victors."

"Already?" I ask almost laughing. More out of shock rather than finding something funny.

"Yes." She smiles. "He assures me that they can move to end these games as soon as tonight."

I start smiling when the full truth of it hits me. "This is great."

"I knew you be would pleased." Coin continues to smile. "Not just because of your personal connections either."

That's the main reason i'm so happy about this, Coin knows too, i can see it in her eyes as she gently places her hand on my shoulder. Still she doesn't mention it, or even show any disapproval of it.

"Feel free to remain here and watch the remainder of the games." She takes her hand off my shoulder and starts walking for the door. "Boggs and I will join you shortly."

"Thank you, President Coin." I smile.

Courteously Coin bows her head and leaves the room.

I can't stop smiling as I slink into the nearest chair, mostly because I know that in a few hours Johanna will be here in Thirteen. I don't know what I'll say to her, she thinks I'm dead for crying out loud. What if she doesn't remember me? It's not impossible ... no, no of course she remembers me. I guess I'll have to wait and see. Wait through these anxious hours and hope I don't loose all sense of reality.


	13. Chapter 13

The screens crackle in front of us, and we wait impatiently with bated breath. Even though the live footage of the arena had cut, none of us dared turn of the feed. Beetee's plan was meant to work, so that when the lightning struck at midnight it would create a flow between the wire and the tree and destroy the arena that way. But it didn't play out like that. Instead the remaining careers got involved, destroying the coil and seperating the group. When Finnick and Peeta heard a cannon boom they split up in search of Katniss and Johanna, leaving Beetee on his own to come up with a new plan.

It was insane. Peeta ended up in a fight with Brutus and somehow managed to kill the big man, knocking himself out in the process. Johanna was running from Enobaria, trying to lose the sharp toothed savage amongst the tree's and circle back around for Katniss - they were fighting when the cameras disconnected. Katniss had found her way back to an unconscious Beetee, who in the midst of desperation had tried to destroy the force field surrounding the arena by running at it with a makeshift spear wrapped in the coil. His plan no doubt being to lodge the spear in the force field so that when the lightning struck it destroyed it. That's where Katniss got her idea from, and before Finnick could stop her she had fired the arrow upwards to the sky and was sent flying back when the tree exploded and the arena broke down around them.

Since then there's been nothing. Not even some Capitol broadcast to try and twist the truth. It meant two things. One, the act had taken Snow by storm. Two, he was already sending his beloved peacekeeper army to retrieve whoever they could from the arena. Which left us hoping Plutarch had the head start on them. Though now it's been almost an hour and we've heard nothing from him. President Coin was tapping her fingers on the desk, trying over and over again to reach Plutarch in any way she could to no avail.

I think I speak for each and every person in the room when I say, I hope to God he has extracted them all and the only reason he can't contact us is because the Capitol might track him. As unlikely as that is, it's the best I can come up with right now.

Boggs shifts around in his chair, switching his gaze between the screen and Coin. "Madame President, I can arrange a squad and have them on the way to the arena inside the hour."

"No." Coin holds up her hand and sighs. "No, they'll never get there in time. We have to put all of our faith in Heavensbee."

Let's be honest, there really is no other choice. If Plutarch hasn't managed to extract Katniss then, well, what can we do?

It seems that way for three long, tedious hours, whilst the crackling of the screens continue in the background to remind us all of how much was riding on a single call. When it eventually came through, the tension in the room didn't lift, if anything it grew, knowing the future rests on the first words from Plutarch's mouth.

The blonde haired man appears on the screens, and for once he's not smiling. I take it as a bad sign.

"Plutarch." Coin is out of her seat, her hands resting on the desk as she says. "What's the situation?"

"Madame President..." He lingers. Purposely or no, it agitated Coin. "I can happily say we managed to extract Katniss Everdeen safely."

The belated sigh the President releases is one of satisfaction and relief. A thin smile even makes it onto her lips, but it's soon outlived.

"And the boy?" She asks, sitting herself down again.

This was the part I was dreading, because even before Plutarch said it, I knew.

"We failed to recover Peeta Mellark and Johanna Mason." Plutarch dips his head, and I can't help but to hate him. "The Capitol crafts were incoming, and had we lingered, we never would have escaped in time."

So he left them! Left them to be captured by Snow, tortured and beaten by him! Left them at his mercy which will please him endlessly!

"You left them?" I let it slip out of me with a growl.

"I had no other choice..."

"You left them?!" I spit it out again before I can hold my tongue. "He'll kill them!."

"I'm sorry, Ethan." Plutarch bows his head again. "I know you were close with..."

"And you left her!"

"If I could have..." He gets cut off.

"Plutarch, there is no need to explain. We understand." Coin interjects and glares at me.

"Of course." Plutarch bows his head. "We did however recover Beetee Latier and Finnick Odair. We are en-route to thirteen as I speak."

"That's excellent news, Plutarch." Coin smiles. "If there are any updates..."

"I'll inform you immediately."

The President thanks him and disconnects, then turns around to face me.

"Ethan..."

"We can send a team to the Capitol. Get them back." I spurt out my thoughts so fast I almost trip on my words.

"That's not possible." Of course Coin shoots it down.

It's not impossible. It's dangerous sure, but not impossible.

"We can't risk all of this for two people."

"Two people! Two people who made all of this possible!" I shout and stand up, imposing over Coin.

Boggs is up and in front of me in no time, his hands on my shoulders as he says. "The President is right Ethan. We can't help them right now."

"Johanna knew the risks when she agreed to be a part of this." Coin stands up and pushes Boggs gently, making him step aside. "Yes we wouldn't have a rebellion if not for her or Peeta, but I think what they'd want more than anything is to know their sacrifice was what brought Snow to justice."

Sacrifice? So she won't help them at all? Not even after the Mockingjay is safe?

"You're just going to leave them?"

"I can't risk losing the freedom of millions to save two. And you know i'm right."

I do, but it still wouldn't stop me from doing everything I could to save them from what Snow will have in mind. I can't help but feel like I can do something, if only Coin will let me.

"You're dismissed for today Ethan." Coin says sternly. "You may take the time to regather your thoughts in your personal quarters."

More like i'm being confined there, but I don't argue with her. I won't waste my breath trying to convince a heart that had already decided. So I allow Boggs to escort me to my quarters, and before he leaves me he explains how sorry he is. Not like he understands how it feels. To have somebody you care about held captive by the person who took everything she loved away from her.

Knowing what lies in store for Johanna just makes it worse. What they did to me in that place will be considered light compared to what they'll do to her. I wish I didn't know that. That entire night I can't sleep for the thoughts racing endlessly through my head. With every blink I could see cell walls, white as snow yet dark as the nights sky. Every breath I took was short, shaky, and the fear set in that each would be my last. It was as if I was there again, in the Capitol, knowing that each day will bring untold pain. Only I was seeing the familiar hell through someone else's eyes. Hearing someone else's cries, and shallow breaths. I had to hit myself on the head to make it go away.

When morning came I felt like death, but I was more than the glad to be up and moving.

I get my schedule tattooed onto my arm, and skip breakfast all together. My appetite is the last thing on my mind, so I just head straight for the armoury for half hour and fill in on whatever extra work needed doing there. Usually they'd turn anyone else away unless it was part of their day, but with things going well as of late, extra work was needed anyway. I pass way more time there than I was supposed too, effectively missing my 10am nuclear history period and 11am cleaning duties. I'm bound to get an earful for that, more than so after yesterday. Boggs is likely looking for me already, no doubt carrying Coin's message on how if it happens again there'll be consequences. I clear out of the armoury around 12 for that reason, Boggs will know this is where i'm spending my time, so he's easily avoided.

Or so I thought. I get to the main chamber before I hear him running up behind me, though when he starts walking at my side he doesn't mention missing schedule, or anything about the armoury. His first words are. "Come with me."

In his voice I hear the concern, so I follow him to the hangar. It's apparent when we're there why there's mass hysteria, and it's not coming from 13's residents. Over a hundred people stand by the hangar doors, covered in black soot, crying and panicking, searching for family amongst the others. I see a woman get on her knee's and scream about how she lost her baby, and I know - or can guess - who these people are. When I see a man of nineteen at the back of the crowd, stood beside a group who looked like him - and Katniss Everdeen's family - I know for certain.

"Boggs. It's Hawthorne." I point him out to Boggs, who takes off instantly. I follow.

"Gale Hawthorne?" Boggs pushes through the crowd and we stop in front of the tall man with brown hair and blue eyes. "Katniss' cousin, correct?"

"According to the Capitol." Gale mumbles and looks down at his hands.

Stepping forward from behind Boggs I ask. "What the hell happened?"

It was Katniss' mother that stepped forward, holding the hand of Primrose, Katniss' sister. "The Capitol ... Twelve they..."

Gale sighed, and as he spoke you could sense the venom in his tone and the fire burning in his heart. "They dropped fire bombs on Twelve. We're all that's left."

Boggs - his brows furrowed - looks to me, as if he found it hard to believe that the Capitol would go that far against a District who weren't rebelling. Of course they would, Twelve has probably been a target since the last victory tour, if not since Katniss whipped out those berries in the 74th games. I'm surprised he waited this long to wipe it off the map.

"Katniss is she..." Primrose steps forward. "Is she here?"

"No." Boggs shakes his head.

All in perfect sync; Gale, Prim and Mrs Everdeen drop their heads to the floor, the thought that Katniss was dead creeping into their minds. I can't say it was unexpected, with the way Boggs handled the question.

Again speaking up I say. "Katniss is alive."

"How do you know that?" Gale asks enthusiastically. Obviously he cares a great deal for Katniss, somewhat more than the Capitol made up.

"President Coin will explain." Boggs jumps in to answer before I can. "She'll want to speak with you."

"There was a plan wasn't there?" Gale's jaw locks, his teeth grind against one another. "A rebellion?"

I look at Boggs before nodding. "There is a rebellion in motion, it started when Katniss won the Games, and it's going to end with Snow's death."

Hawthorne likes that, you can see the flames fanning out in his eyes as he smiles. He wants to fight. Coin is going to love him.

"It's about time." He says.

"If you'll please follow us." Boggs motions with his hand.

As I follow Boggs silently, with Gale at my side telling us all about the attacks on twelve, I realise exactly what is about to come. War. Full scale war with the Capitol, with Snow, a chance to end the injustice that the games had caused us for seventy five years. I'll be honest, I thought the prospect of war would terrify me, but I'm actually excited, knowing it's just hours away from truly beginning.

Perhaps I've gone crazy, or maybe I'm just sick of taking the shit Snow throws at us and pretending it hasn't happened. Either way, I'm ready and I'm willing to die if it helps the cause. So long as I see that Johanna is safe from the Capitol before hand, I can die a satisfied man.


	14. Chapter 14

The wind is cold and stings my face, but I'm hardly paying attention to it. All I see is the muddy wet ground, occupied by a lifeless body with no face, because of me. Jackson. I can only recognise him by the blonde hair and the way his face lay on the rock, slanted and mangled. I bring my hands up to my face and stare at them. They're covered in blood, not mine but his and it's all over me. I try wiping it away but it just keeps coming back, each time it's more and more.

I hear rustling in the tree's beside me, somebody is running towards me, possibly away from something or someone. I jump up off of my position on the ground the second I see the silohette of a woman in the shadows, ready to turn and flee but something stops me. I know the woman, I know it, and when she speaks to me her voice stirs something deep inside me. Anger? Worry? I can't place it.

"We gotta go, now!" The woman says in a hurry and beckons me towards her.

I want to question her, but I realise I'm not in control here. Without a word I follow her, quicker and quicker until we're practically running through the tree's away from the unknown. For a very brief moment the moon light flickers through the trees, bringing a small share of light to this nightmare. In that moment I see the womans face as she stops, turns to me to tell me to hurry and then starts running again.

"Johanna?" My heart races as I follow her once more.

As I'm running, dodging trees and trying not to loose my footing, I shout out to her again but she doesn't stop running. If anything she seems to get faster to a point it almost feels like she's running away from me. I barely manage to keep up with her, but eventually she leads me out onto a field with nothing more then a tunnel that goes underground placed in the centre. I freeze up when I reach the tunnels mouth, the familiar smell of rot and decay brings back painful memories of beatings and cell walls. I see Johanna - though hardly - walking through the tunnel, mindful of where she steps. She reaches the end of the tunnel and just as the light seeps through the opening door I rememeber where it leads.

"No! Don't go in there!" I yell as loud as I can but again she doesn't listen to me.

I force myself into the tunnel, running through it as fast as possible, slipping on the bones and blood that paint the ground. I reach her too late, as the door closes on my face as I reach the end of the tunnel. I tug and pull with all my strength but the door isn't budging. I kick it and ram and still nothing moves it. I refuse to give in and continue to try everything in my arsenal to get the damn door open, but it all turns out to be futile. The door opens on its own from the otherside and no matter the fear I feel in my heart I charge inside. There awaits me the man who fills my every nightmare including this one, the man who loves to remind me what he did to me even when he is incapable of touching me again. Thread.

The smile that settles onto his face is terrifying as I take a step closer, but I won't let him intimidate me when it's HER life on the line.

"Where is she?" I demand from him, grinding my teeth furiously.

He doesn't answer further fuelling my rage.

"Where is she?" I step ever closer and wrap my hands around his neck.

Thread laughs at me and then fades to dust in my hands. A moment later I spot him wandering down the hall, twirling his whip around between his fingers as he whistles a less than delightful tune. I take chase after him without further debate, the will to find and protect Johanna from that monster of a man outweighs any fear I have of meeting my end in his hands. He turns a corner and leads me to a cell with glass walls, only he's on the opposite side standing over Johanna who is out cold, and I can't reach him.

His smile continues to haunt through me as he uncoils his whip and raises it high in the air. I swear his eyes start turning red as he brings the whip crashing down, again and again and again, all the while I can do nothing but stand at the glass banging and screaming away at him to stop hurting her.

* * *

I wake up with cold sweat dripping off of me like a waterfall and panting like a wounded animal. It takes me a while to notice where I am, to remind myself that it was just a nightmare and it isn't real, despite how it felt. Then I remember it is real, I'm just not there to help them. I let my head fall into my hands and I try to think of something else, anything else,  
but all I see that face smiling at me like the devil himself.

Tearing the covers off of me I throw my feet over the bed and onto the floor. Hanson is sat up in his bed staring at me,  
looking confused and worried all the same.

"You okay man?" He asks, taking a position similar to mine.

I shake my head. "No. I'm not."

I don't elaborate further for him, instead I head to the bathroom and splash some water over my face. The silence leads to me thinking again, this time not about the dream but what is probably really happening in the hell beneath the tribute centre in the Capitol right now. I'm not there but I can hear their screams, their pleads for help and it scares me as much as it angers me. If I knew I could get away with it I'd steal myself a damn hovercraft and fly to the Capitol to help them myself; Johanna, Peeta and now Annie Cresta - the woman Finnick Odair loves - who was captured not long after he arrived here in Thirteen with Katniss Everdeen. You can be damn sure nobody who is actually in a position to rescue them is in any hurry, and yes I mean Coin. If anything she talks about them like they're already dead, it's always "they're sacrifice" or "they'll be remembered" with her. It's annoying and it's slowly driving me crazy to think she just wants them to die for the cause.

I know I'm not the only one here feeling like this now though. I'm not the only one who would finally fly off the handle should anything actually happen to any of them that were captured. Katniss was only recently released from the hospital as I hear it, they finally thought she was mentally stable enough to be introduced to Coin and the Mockingjay idea, though she refused because Coin refused to go back for Peeta. Good on her I say, I wouldn't get away with such a thing but she can get away with murder down here. I also heard that Finnick was in the hospital, apparently he had a breakdown once he heard about Annie. I can relate to the guy, though they didn't stick me in a gown and keep me on constant serveilance.  
Not yet anyway.

Unable to clear my mind by staying in my room I decide to get dressed and head out to the armory to do some work, it may help me. Or not as the case may be. I tried to clear my head of those images and sounds, but since the armory is so empty and silent all they do is get more frequent. I'm loosing my damn mind and there isn't a thing I can do about it. I could go to the hospital and talk it out with one of the doctors, but from my time with them when I first arrived in Thirteen I know they don't do much but tell you not worry or that you're in no danger at all.

I grab some weapons from the racks that need adjusting and work away, making as much noise as I possibly can whenever the thoughts crept back up even slightly, it works for a while, I get so distracted by the noise everything else kind of just fizzles away. When everyone starts piling into the armory by the boatload there's no reason for me to keep clanging and battering everything I get my hands on. They made good timing too, I'm pretty sure I broke something a moment ago. With the comforting sounds of people chatting away, I work away with a mostly clear head and try to look like I'm supposed to be here right now, though odds are I'm probably supposed to be cleaning the bathrooms as a punishment.

"There you are. I started to worry when I couldn't find you in the mess hall." Cressida throws her gear down onto the ground and pulls out a pistol, which she instantly gets to work on.

I don't reply to her, instead I point my head down and continue to fumble about with the tools in my hands. Cressida is staring at me for a long while, I can feel it, but I still don't move or even acknowledge her standing there. I don't want to have to explain myself and my constant absence for breakfast or lunch, or that because I'm barely getting any sleep at night I just don't feel like sitting around a table and conversing with her or the guys. I'm a real mood killer lately, trust me.

"Is everything okay?" Cressida stops me from working and forces me to look up.

I pull my hands away from hers and grab another gun. "Fine. I'm just not sleeping too good."

Well I've not slept well since the Hunger Games, not really. But the nightmares - the gruelling, torturing nightmares that still play out in my mind like a movie during the day - were never this constant before. Sometimes I daren't even close my eyes because I know what I'll see when I do and it scares me.

"Maybe the doctors at the hospital can give you something?" The second Cressida suggests it I frown, and I know she picks up on my disliking to thought of asking the doctors for help. "You need help Ethan, putting it off will only make things worse."

"I can manage."

"No you can't." Her voice holds a certain authoritive tone. It feels like I'm one of her camera crew being forced to follow orders. "We're worried about you, me and the guys. And if we really will be sent into battle soon we need you at your best. Odds are Coin won't even let you leave Thirteen if you aren't in the right place."

There's no argument there. Though Coin won't likely let me leave the district anyway. She hasn't called for me since my outburst and she hardly seems the forgiving woman. I think it's time I faced it, I had all the oppertunities to fight back laid out in front of me and I threw them all away in a matter of seconds. I'm angry at myself for that too, for loosing the Presidents respect. I might've been able to convince her that we needed all the victors and should rescue them at the earliest convenience. I'm deluding myself I know, but it's a thought that keeps circling my mind regardless.

"Please go to the hospital during your free time, ask them for help." Cressida says sincerely.

I don't know whether I mean it or not but I nod my head and agree just to put her mind at ease if nothing else. She seems happier by it and changes the conversation to something a little lighter. Her stories from the Capitol are quite something, especially the ones about some actor she once filmed a documentary on. He's terrible by all accounts - I've had the pleasure of watching one of his so called masterpieces - but he himself thinks he was blessed by God at birth and actually had the gall to call Cressida out for everything she was doing wrong. I don't think he liked it that much when she pointed out his flaws in return.

By the time she finishes telling the story lunch is called. Most of the people in the armoury instantly drop what they're carrying - no nukes thankfully - and rush to the jam packed corridor to get the mess hall the quickest. Cressida and I stay back to put everything away properly before heading in the general direction of the mess ourselves. On our way we discuss schedules, or rather hers since I had a rebellion of my own and didn't get mine this morning - still waiting on the earful or the bullet to the head. She's actually very enthuiastic about her job cleaning the bathrooms after lunch, making a few wry remarks on how she hopes the cooks don't have that duty before they go and make the grub. I never thought about that and now it's in my head I'm all the more sure I'm not going to eat anything. So when we meet up with the rest of the camera crew and they all grab trays of sludge and sit down I watch them with a small grin on my face, carefully sipping my cup of water as Mesalla and Castor shove spoonfuls of the stuff in their mouths.

We end up discussing what it's like back in District Seven once Castor has told me about the Capitol. It's surprising how enthralled they are by the thought of pretty much living in the woods, doing the same thing every day and always smelling like a pine tree. I tell them about my house, my friends and family, my boring job and the places I'd go to sneak off for a nap sometimes when I just downright couldn't be bothered with working. They look shocked when I tell them I was never caught, not by a peacekeeper anyway, but I soon realise it's not my incredible illusiveness that has them sitting there slack jawed. It's what's on the TV screens around the mess hall that has their undivided attention.

Caesar Flickerman, the man of the hour, and Peeta Mellark, the boy who is being held captive, calling for a cease fire. Oh the angry roars and harsh insults that fill the mess are almost deafening as Peeta is instantly branded a traitor.

Through all the uproar currently consuming the place it's fairly difficult to see the person who runs out of the mess with their head in their hands, but seeing as no one else knows and understands Peeta I'm assuming it was Katniss. It's strange, even though I haven't met her yet I actually want to chase after her and tell her it's going to be okay, to ignore these assholes who don't understand what the right amount of fear applied by the Capitol can do. It takes all I have to restrain myself from doing so, plus the sudden need to speak with Coin, regardless of what she'll think of me barging into her office.

I excuse myself from the others and head straight there, breaking out into a jog when I see Boggs heading down the corridor. He locks his eyes onto me and breaths out heavily, almost sighing as I reach him.

"I was just about to come looking for you." He says. "Coin wants to see you. Immediately."

"Lead the way." I gesture forward, forcing a smile off of Boggs.

Along the short distance to Coin's office I notice how the chaos in the mess isn't just confined there. Everybody across the District is losing their minds in rage, it has Boggs worried and Coin too by all acounts. As Boggs explains to me, it's bad that the Capitol are using Mellark as a means of propaganda to hurt us here in Thirteen. He's just as loved as Katniss, in some cases maybe more so, and he was always the voice of reason between the pair of them. If it looks like he's on the Capitols side then it makes us look like the bad guys, the villains. Basically we become Snow as long as Peeta is calling for a stop to the rebellions and Katniss is nowhere to be seen. We need her voice, it's the only one people will listen too more then his.

I feel rather anxious as we enter the office and Coin is sat waiting, staring at the door with her cold eyes. In my anger I got a little too close to doing something I would've have regretted, she sure as hell hasn't forgotten that. She smiles warmly as she stands to greet me, though there's a sense of dread that I still can't shake no matter the niceties. "Hello again Ethan."

"President Coin." I smile back, though I know she sees right through it. She knows I'm afraid of her. I get to what she's waiting for immediately, not daring to push my luck any further then I already have. "I wanted to apologise for my behavior. I realise now that you were right. Sending Plutarch back for the others - or any kind of rescue - would have ended our chances before they even began. I'm sorry, and I promise it won't ever happen again."

It kills me saying that to her because I know it will happen again if anything happens to Johanna. Coin knows that, she has too, though she makes no acknowledgment of it even if she does see through my bullshit.

Her smile feels more genuine as she invites me to sit beside her. "Apology accepted. I understand it was hard for you, you're only human after all, but I'm glad you see there was no way of reaching them in time."

I nod at her, hoping it's enough to seem convincing.

"I assume you saw the footage from the Capitol?" She asks.

I respond with a yes and Coin goes on to explain how even if they were to attempt a rescue on the victors Peeta has just made it considerably more difficult to pull off. It's no longer just a case of breaking into the Capitol, the minute they walk into the District people will want their heads, assuming all three of them are actually allies of the Capitol and turn cloaks to us. I get the feeling Coin is telling me this to see if I'll explode again, but in this case I actually agree with her. At the moment it'll be just as dangerous here for them as it is in the Capitol.

"What do we do?" I ask.

"We pacify the District first." She explains. "After that Plutarch and I will meet with Everdeen once more. I think seeing this little propaganda campaign is just enough fuel to ignite the fire."

We can only hope right.

"In the meantime, I want you to speak with Doctor Hamlin." President Coin looks at me knowingly. "After he's evaluated your condition we'll discuss your future."

"Of course ma'am." I bob my head respectifully and try to keep my curious mind from wondering exactly what she meant by my future.

"You're dismissed for now Ethan."

I get up out of the seat and head for the door, determined to get out of this office before I run my mouth and start asking questions. The way she said "you're future" sent chills up my spine, like she was promising me a rough road in the days to come. As much as I want to find out exactly what she meant I'm not stupid enough to risk it right now. I can wait until this doctor passes his evaluation on to her and then find out, for better or worse.

"Oh and Ethan." Coins voice calls me back. "No more skipping schedules. Or missing them entirely for that matter. The punishment is not something I'd want you to endure."

The smile on her face grows more unsettling by the second as I backstep out of the room.


	15. Chapter 15

**Here is Chapter 15, finally! I aplologise for the incredibly long wait between chapters. Due to course work for college**  
 **and applying to universities I barely found the time or the will to write just about anything, but since I finished mostly all**  
 **of that over the christmas holidays, I'm now able to focus on continuing this story.**

 **I can't promise that updates will be as regular as they were, but I will try to push a new chapter out as often as I can.**

 **Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoy the chapter.**

* * *

"So, what exactly is the problem Mr Mayne?" The doctor sits comfortably in his chair, folding up his glasses and placing them neatly on his desk.

I hesitate to tell him my problems, largely in part to my history with other doctors here. After I was rescued from the Capitol by Plutarch and brought here by Boggs, I had to spend a short while here in the care of the good doctors. As far as the physical injuries went they were great, but when I started telling them about the nightmares and the occasional flashback during the day the only thing they could offer me was a worthless "It'll be okay now." or "They can't hurt you." I understand they were just doing their jobs, but it sure as hell didn't help me. It makes me wonder why I'm here now, aside from Coin ordering me to be.

"Nightmares." I put it bluntly, earning a look off of the doctor.

That seems to clear it up for him as he smiles and nods. "You had this problem before?"

I nod my head. "Not as bad though."

"Hmm." He taps his pencil on the arm of the chair a couple of times. "Explain these nightmares to me."

"Do I really have too?" I've speant the whole day trying to keep them off my mind. Describing what I go to sleep too every night doesn't exactly excite me.

"If you want me to help you then yes, you do."

I sigh, resisting the temptation to tell him I didn't actually want his help, it was Cressida and Coin who wanted it for me. I go on to explain the nightmare in full, during which he occasionally stops me to prod until he's learned every single detail, no matter how small. What intrigues him the most is the part about Commander Thread, the man who's always been in the nightmares, then and now.

"Are you afraid of him?" The doctors eyes bore into me.

It feels like I should say yes, but in the back of my mind there's a little voice yelling no. No, if I ever see him again I'll glady kill him, slowly, like he would have done to me had I stayed in that hell any longer then I had. I don't say that out loud - I'd be getting treated for something else if I had - but I wanted too.

"I'm more afraid of what it is he's doing right now." I settle for something slightly less psychotic. "I close my eyes and it's all I see, like I'm actually following him for real."

"That's nothing out of the ordinary, considering your own experiences and ties to the captured victors." He waits for a moment before correcting himself. "Or one of them."

I'm half surprised he used the word victors and not traitors, almost everyone else in the District does. It seems one person sets the standard for the whole of their kind. Peeta is apparently a traitor, so now Johanna and Annie are too. What's next? Is Katniss a traitor for loving Peeta? For a bunch of people so hell bent on change we have a really hard time looking at the bigger picture. The victors don't need our petty hate, they need our help.

"So what can you do to help?" I ask, trying to rush this along so I can get back to Coin. "Tell me that i'm gonna be fine? Talk some more?"

The doctor, believe it or not, actually starts laughing at me. "No, i'm not going to tell you that. Coin did instruct that I simply council you but I don't think that will work. You're suffering night terrors, in turn this is causing your anxiety during the day."

"Then what?"

"I'll give you something to help you sleep. Diazepam." He explains. "This should also calm you down during wake hours."

Will it stop the night terrors though? What if I take these things and have the nightmare, only I can't wake myself up from it? I realise I should be asking him all of this but I don't want to sound any crazier then I already do. He writes my next appointment down on a piece of paper before handing it to me, telling me how he still wants to speak to me occasionally just to check the perscription is working. With that done and agreed too, he leads me out into the hall, where he tells me to wait whilst he fetches my meds.

I take seat along the far wall, closest to the set of stairs that lead back down to the first floor of the hospital. The doctor is gone for at least ten minuets, most of which I sit there looking dumb or playing with the zip on my ugly grey suit. That is until someone makes their way down the hall, then I can't do much of anything but stare. It's shock more then anything else, shock at watching Finnick Odair stumble aimlessly down the hall looking as though he wants to curl up into a ball and just cry. It's a big difference to what I saw during the Quell, other then the time with the Jabberjays of course. All that confidence and swagger is lost in the form of a broken, distraught shell.

He slowly sits down next me, his hands clasped together tightly around a short length of rope tied like a noose. He pulls at it constantly, undoing it and tying it again, tighter and tighter until there's actually marks left on his palms. It doesn't take him long to realise I'm watching him and when he does I almost feel guilty for doing so. He just looks so sad, so out of it, to an extent where I don't even think he's even in there anymore.

I tear my eyes away so not to make him feel uncomfortable, it's then I hear his voice, low and raspy, mumble. "What do they have you up here for?"

I look his way once again, trying to hide the surprise of hearing him speak to me. "Night terrors." I answer.

His eye twitches a few times as he nods his head. "I get those. It's why they keep telling me I can't leave."

I don't think it's the only reason. Rumours around the district say he's suicidal, letting him out of the eyes of the doctors is just an all round stupid idea. In some ways so is letting him have that rope, though I suppose it's not enough to actually fit around his neck.

"Do they stay with you during the day?" Finnick unties the noose once more and starts over. "Everytime I blink I see what they're doing to Annie. I can't stop it."

"They do." It sounds awful, but you've no idea how relieved I am to hear I'm not the only one who can't get those kind of thoughts and images out of my head. "It feels like you never actually wake up."

"Exactly." He smiles, as though his feelings are mutual when it comes to understanding what it's like.

Things go quiet for a while as he goes back to his rope and I to tapping my finger on my arm to stop myself from getting extremely bored. The doctor is still nowhere to be seen, and neither is whoever Finnick is waiting for. I'm starting to think the doctor was lying to me, just telling me he'd give me something in order to get me to agree to counciling. It wouldn't be the first time they've pulled something like that.

My thoughts are cut off by an extended, rope marked hand as Finnick says. "I'm Finnick by the way."

I shake his hand and introduce myself. "Ethan."

"If you don't mind me asking Ethan, what exactly are your nightmares about?" He puts down the rope and begins fiddling with his fingers. "I know it seems nosey of me, it's just nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like they're going insane."

"I understand." I smile, and I'll openly admit I wouldn't mind explaining things to him like I did the doctor. Mainly because I know he'll agree with everything I say. I don't have to explain it in full though, he pretty much already knows. "Would you believe me if I said it's pretty much the same as yours, only with someone else?"

He watches me for moment before chuckling. "I'm hardly in a position not too."

He's right, he doesn't know me. I could have spun any bullshit story I wanted too and he would've had to take it as gospel. I don't see the point in making something up though, it's hardly like he'd judge me for it.

"Is it a family member? Partner?" He asks.

I chuckle and shake my head. "No, just someone I care about. Despite having not seen them for four years."

"Time can't stop you caring about someone." He looks down at his hospital issue shoes and smiles. "Doesn't matter how long or short, once the feelings are there."

I agree with him, and before I can stop myself I say. "I guess time in the Hunger Games can be a week but feel like a year."

That gets the gears turning in his mind. His eyes widen and lock onto me like a hawk. "You were in the Games?" He stutters a little, reminding me of Blight.

"Yeah." Unable to take back what I said I decide to be honest with him, entirely. "You ugh, you actually wanted your tributes to ally with me and..."

"Johanna." He finishes for me. "I remember you."

I'm guessing it was the beard that made it harder for him to recognise me, or just the four years between now and then. The latter seems the more obvious one I know.

There's a flash of anguish across his face. "I'm sorry. I wanted to go back and get her but..."

As he trails off my mind flashes back to when Plutarch informed us that he had failed to recover Johanna and Peeta. All the anger I felt at the drop of the bomb returns in full force, so bad I actually want to go find the gamemaker and give him a piece of my mind despite the definite reprisal. I try not to feel distain towards him, I know he wouldn't have left them if the circumstances were any different, but it's hard. I wonder, if it had been Johanna they rescued and Katniss was captured would I still feel the same? Would I be this mad at everyone? The answer is likely no, I wouldn't, but if it was Katniss that was captured we already would have stormed the Capitol to rescue her by now. She's too important to lose, anyone else is expendable.

"I wanted to go back too." I mumble to him.

He looks at his hands and nods slowly.

Hurried feet tapping on the marble floors approach us. The doctor - carry two perscription bottles of Diazepam - stops in front of us, bowing his head to Finnick with a warm and gentle smile. I get up out of my seat to greet him and he hands me the bottles - telling me that they should help - along with a note that I was supposed to give to Coin as soon as possible. It's probably his verdict on my sanity. I'm almost tempted to unfold the paper and read it, maybe change it if necessary, but I restrain myself.

"Right then, Mr Odair." The doctor claps his hands and gestures towards his room.

Finnick grabs his rope off the chair next to him and stands, shuffling over to the door hesitantly. The doctor never takes his eyes off the rope, watching carefully how Finnick guarded it close to his chest like it was his child. I can't tell if it's worry I see in his eyes or pity.

Before following the doctor through to his room, Finnick turns around and smiles at me. "It was nice to meet you, Ethan."

"You too." I can't help but laugh to myself as I add. "Finally."

I see him laughing too as he disappears behind the cold steel door.

I hide the bottles of diazepam in by pockets before setting off towards Coins office. I can't wait to hear what she has to say to me when she reads this note. It could be bad or it could be good. I count being asigned to toilet cleaning duties as bad, for the record. Still, in some ways Coin is an agreeable woman and I know she wants me for something other than just sitting around all day. She would have gotten rid of me a long time ago otherwise. Unless that is her plan, to kill me as an example of the enemy in cahoots with Snow. Most people don't trust me, it wouldn't be hard to plant a seed in their minds. That's being a little paranoid though, she wouldn't really gain anything from killing me - it's not exactly like Snow cares about what happens to me is it.

I brush the thoughts away and sigh as I approach Coins office door. There are voices inside, three of them, one unmistakably the authoritive tone of Coin and the other the confident sound of Plutarch Heavensbee. The third is too quiet to make out. I calm my nerves at the sound of Plutarch's voice and knock on the door gently. Coin calls me in.

"Ethan." She smiles. "Just in time.

"In time for what?" My question is answered when I follow Coins line of sight. I feel stupid for not recognising Katniss sitting there at the table the second I walked in here.

I imediately turn to Coin to apologise for intruding on the meeting, but the President holds up her hand and waves it off, gesturing me to take a seat on the other side of her. I ignore the grin forming on Plutarch's face as I sit down, thankful that Coin is sitting inbetween us at least for now.

"Now, Ms Everdeen, you were saying?" Coin smiles at Katniss as she motions for the girl on fire to continue.

I can see Katniss watchig me cautiously for a time, before her eyes drift back to the small sheet of wrinkled paper she holds in her hands. She rises out of the chair she sat in and clears her throat. "I agree to be your Mockingjay, on the following conditions."

Coin nods for her to continue.

"Peeta and the other victors - Johanna Mason and Annie Cresta - will be rescued from the Capitol at the earliest oppertunity.  
If and when Peeta is liberated, he will recieve a full and uncondtional pardon and no punishment will be inflicted. The same goes for the other victors."

I stare dumbfounded at Katniss, shocked and elated, that she would even ask Coin to do those things. Coin made it clear to me that she was more then okay to leave those captured to their fates, asking her to rescue them - and then pardon them - was a bold and daring move. Even for someone like Katniss, who right now could probably demand whatever she wanted and get it.

I can see Coin's gears turning in her head as she stares Katniss down, forcing me to wonder what exactly it is that has her debating against the idea. Pardoning Annie would be easy, she knew nothing about the rebellion so therefore can't tell the Capitol squat about us. Johanna is complicated because she did know about everything - the plan in the arena and the plan to overthrow the Capitol - and whilst i'm certain of her enough to trust that she wouldn't say a damn thing to those bastards, Coin isn't. Peeta is the real problem. People are already calling for his head here in thirteen, if Coin was to outright pardon him from everything then there could be another revolt on her hands, with people wanting her head instead of Snow's.

It's still an easy decision for me, taking everything into consideration, but the decision isn't mine to make. Unfortunate as that is. If it were up to me I'd have them all rescued and pardoned by morning.

Coin breaths out heavilly, her steely eyes giving nothing away in regards to how she truly feels about the situation. She contemplates for a moment longer. "No." She says bluntly.

In some ways I knew that was coming. I think Katniss did too, considering she showed little to no reaction at all on the surface. She was feeling it though, that anger and annoyance that I too can feel bubbling back up again. I have to force myself to look in any other direction but at Coin right now, otherwise I think I'll have another outburst and Boggs isn't here to stop me this time.

"It's not their fault that you abandoned them in the arena." Katniss is able to keep her emotions in check better then I am, as she continues to speak calmly, looking Coin in the eyes as she does so. "They're doing and saying whatever they can to survive."

"Individuals don't make demands here in thirteen." The president writes something down in the book in front of her before continuing. "There will be a tribunal, and a fair judgement."

Fair judgement? By a court made up of people who have already made their voices clear on what they think of the victors?  
That doesn't sound fair to me. I have to resist the urge to say anything as Coin just directs her head down to her book like she has already decided she wouldn't accept any demands Katniss made. Thankfully, Katniss steps up and says something first.

"The victors will have immunity and you will announce that in front of the entire population of district thirteen." Katniss'  
voice is stern and demanding, awe inspiring really that she dare to use that tone with Coin. "You will hold yourself and your government responsible or you will find another Mockingjay."

"That's it!" Plutarch bursts out excitedly, drawing my eyes to him for the first time since entering the room. "That's her. Right there."

It takes me a while to clock on to what he means. Katniss - from what i'd heard - was a mess when she first got here, they had to keep her in the hospital for a few weeks before they felt it was okay to release her. She was a shell of the girl we saw during the seventy forth hunger games and the quarter quell, timid and quiet. The girl on fire has just woken up again when she stood her ground against Coin - even the President herself seems impressed.

Plutarch mutters to Coin, looking as though he's about to jump out of his seat he's so excited. I manage to catch something about impact and propaganda campaigns before they both look back to Katniss, Coin now grinning ever so slightly.

The President nods her head, agreeing to the term. "Do you have any other demands?"

Katniss checks the sheet of paper and looks back up to Coin. The serious, sterness to her tone has disappeared entirely as she rolls her eyes. "My sister gets to keep her cat."

I burst into a fit of laughter


End file.
